Judge — March 29, 1919 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Bridging the Chasm ission?” Id say about fou HIGH-BROWS No Traveler—* They do tell as how th’ professor chap wot lives atop o’ the hill yonder ‘ave just wrote a book about Mars.” “Mars? Wot do ’e know about Mars? Why, to my knowledge, ’e ain’t bin out of this neighborhood for seven years.” Passing s (London). One On the Professor—Jne One (to local professor with reputation for great knowledge) —Some people think they know everything. After this had been repeated two or three times the professor replied that he had known people who thought they knew more than they did know, but that he had never met anyone who claimed to know everything. Inebriated One—Well, I can tell you you don’t know! My wife is your washerwoman, and I’m wearing one of your shirts! Bits. iated A Slight Jar trifle cast down.” “Just a little flabbergasted. very correct English.”” “And a slangy salesgirl had to call a floorwalker to interpret for her. Thought the professor was some kind of a for- eigner.""—Kansas City Journal. “The professor seems a He uses Deep Absorption—“ Being the hus- band of an intellectual woman, I don’t suppose you ever try to make any of the time-worn excuses for being out late.” “It isn’t necessary,” said Mr. Nub- witz, “When Mrs. Nubwitz is doing research work in the library she never kn whether I’m on the premises or Birmingham Age-Herald. not.”” The Waiter’s Strike éne pour une Surely you are over said a word about your bein; Le Rire (Paris). eG “eg BAD BREAKS Saving Moonlight—The sitting of the Supreme Inter-Allied War Council lasted from 2.30 till 5.30 p. m. IN THE MORNING.—Glasgow (Scot.) News. This Horrid Sphere—With each year SINCE THE DREADFUL WORLD BEGAN, the general position of sugar from the consumer’s view point... has gone from bad to worse.—British National Association Revi An Odorous Part—In the cast Jim- my Russell is prominent as the saucy boy, and Cyril Cooke is extremely funny as the sMELL,—London Stage. The Passing of a Big Man—Ow1nc TO THE DEATH OF THE Rev. ——, a va- cancy occurs for SLEEPING ACCOMM TION FOR SIX BOYS.—Worthing (E) Gazette, Ad. Wisdom—For Sale . . . Poultry House, 15 ft. by 10 ft., holds 4o owLs.— Leamington (Eng.) News. Family Bits—She leaves no chil- dren, but is survived by a number of PIECES, GRANDPIECES and nephews Springfield Republican. Typographic Apology—Owing to a typographical error in the letter writ- ten by Mrs. Mary B. Avery yesterday in praise of George C ianist, the statement of the writer in reference to the interpretation of Chopin’s works made to read * * when the correct state “sad and dreamy.’ nent should have been Auburn (N. Y.) The Wrong Flock—A merchant in a nearby town has about decided to go out of business since he wrote an ad. for the local paper in which he expounded upon the vast crowds of customers that The printer made the he merchant read his Anyhow here t appeared to the coul seen visited his store mistake, but as th own proof he has is his statement townspeople: “Ii the crows that fl day you would r is good on our | on earth can he ever expect t himself with the ladies » i counters upon that fatal day? Eagle. have yester icking How square ited his Wichita comicbooks.com