Judge, 1919-02-22 · page 17 of 32
Judge — February 22, 1919 — page 17: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page collects brief humorous anecdotes from various newspapers, arranged under three categories: "Way-Farers," "High-Brows," and "Conservatism." The jokes satirize American social types and pretensions: **"Way-Farers"** mocks working-class aspiration (a man wanting a billion dollars instead of a million) and portrays vagrants as philosophical about idleness—one elderly man celebrates doing nothing for ten years as good fortune, inverting conventional work ethic. **"High-Brows"** ridicules intellectuals, particularly a Professor Diggs who studies ancient Egypt while ignoring contemporary politics (Colonel House was a WWI-era political figure), suggesting scholarly detachment from real-world concerns. **"Conservatism"** presents a man dismissing metempsychosis (reincarnation belief) not from conviction but because he can't find the word in a dictionary—satirizing how people adopt positions without understanding them. The top illustration shows two figures pulling a globe apart, suggesting the magazine's intent to dissect global human nature through humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Un espéce d'ind Expanded Ideas—“ Mike,” said Plod ding Pete, “let’s git back to our favorite old time question. What would yous do if you had a million dollars?” “Quit. pikin’. Nobody start ything wit? less dan a billion.” Washington Star nowadays Flattery Did It—" You seem able bodied and healthy; you ought to be strong enough to work,” she remarked scrutinizingly “Yes, ma’am, I know. And you seem beautiful enough to be on the stage, but evidently you prefer the simple life.” He got a meal without any further reference to work ’eople’s Home Jour nal. Beat Him To It—The stranger on a walking tour came across an “old, old man a-sitting on a gate” and asked “You are a farmer, I suppose? “No, not now. Lused to be, but I gave “Well, you don’t scem to be very busy You have plenty of time on your hands, haven’t you?” “Lots of it.” “ Ever do any work?” “Onee [ did.” “What do you do now, if [ may ask?" “Don’t do nothing. Hain't done noth ing for nearly ten years.” “So. Why, you're in luck! If I had done nothing for half that length of time I should be in the poorhouse.”” The old man’s face beamed with a glad surprise, and, then, as one who knows his rare good fortune and values it at its just worth, he cried delightedly: “That's where 1 be!"—Pittshurgh Chronicle-Telegraph. HIGH-BROWS “What's Strange Professor Diggs doing now?’ “Oh, 1 g Egyptolog “Fancy a detached attitude like that when ancient Thebes and Memphis inter est_a man more than Versailles, with Colonel House, so to speak, in the offing!” Birmingham Age-Herald. s he’s still delving into “Do you believe in sked Professor Diggs Hardhead Conservatism metempsychosis?" “No,” answered = Mr. promptly. “Why not?” “Chiefly because there is no dictionary at hand to tell me what the darned word Ige-Herald means.""—Birmingham comicbooks.com