Judge — January 25, 1919 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

timbrel and wan iv them bazookuses ye push and pull whilst ye toot. A “Come on over,” I says. Inta_ th’ that was built U con a Frinch hoorn I was able t’ stow away foor quart bottles, and inta th’ case that was built t’ contain a fiddle I was able v’ stow three more, and foor more wint nately inta th’ impty shell iv a young drum, and wan I tucked inta me hip pocket, makin’ twilve in all. lads,” I says t’ me two frinds, “’twill do ye no harm t’ journey t’ Washin’t’n with me, and for th’ love iv Mike raymimber, come what may, ye are a portion iv th’ Marine Band proceedin’ t’ th’ Capital tv’ discoorse swate i] music. Attintion all! All wint wi “Come, HI had climbed over it attimptin vt climb tv’ “That's lads. “I was raised on it. iv Hivin.” “Lave be!” I says, and a finale t’ hum over.’ “Lave nawthin’ be!” sthand whin th’ Star-Spangled Banner is played on th’ Frinch hoorn.” Thereupon he opened th’ Frinch hoorn case and wan iv th’ bottles and played th’ noble anthem iv our native land upon th’ bottle, first removin’ th’ coork. “Are ye a Boche,” he says, ‘or are ye a pathriotic American, and if so why will ye lave me play th’ grand old tune alone? “This wan tune on’y,” I says, and th’ full band ved th’ nashn’l anthem And England | i lick America! H says th’ Drawn by A. BLWs i { i T’ th’ right obleek, march!” Ht I. We enthered th’ car for Washin’t’n ' and sated oursilves demurely, as good bandsmin should, i and th’ battle wud have been won had th’ conductor | not spied th’ bottle in me hip pocket, where me coat like a Rocky me neck. conthraband,” he I can blow it like an angel “for I have a couple iv sonatas he says, and grabs th’ Frinch hoorn case from between me knees. I c’n wallop th’ man that will not Mrs. Ex-Corporal Si useful since his return if [ know Belgium or no Mountain goat “No wi hiskey “Serbia!” usband much more nashn'l air, though what it “T’'m th’ boss iv this car,” zium.” It was a lonely spot. by th’ side iv th’ thrack and wept for poor Belgium. Her sorrows were many and there was little we could do for her, but what little we could do we did. Bel Hi {| can inter Washin’t’n. Ye'll have t’ get rid iv it imme- played an approximation | jitly.” th’ Belgium nashn’l air | “And how?” I says. Iv Th’ i “How is nothin’ t’ me,” b ays, 80 I removed th’ th’ drum. Ya cork and we got rid iv it imme »asordered. Weall Italy. ah! felt betther whin th’ weight was OF our minds. Some \ iv us sang a few verses joicely. Others iv us played i th’ accompnimint on th’ case iv th’ drum. spilled whin I dhropped me bottle. fi “Th Frinch hoorn for mine!” says wan iv th’ says wan iv th’ lads. “3 in th’ 4 lad. “Brave England! He’s a low hound who will not jine honoring iv our brave ally, th’ mistriss iv th’ seas. We will play th’ first ilivin verses iv God Save the King, omittin’ th’ sivinth and third vers And bonny France,” says th’ other lad, with tears. “We'll play a couple iv inches out iv afresh bottle for th’ land that niver yielded.” “Enough!” said th’ con- ductor, whin we had played a quart or two iv th’ most liquid measures iv th’ Mar- seillaise. ‘Here’s where ye get off the car.” “But poor Belgium?” I says. ‘Are ye a German spy in disguise that ye offer us indignity just whin we are about v play th’ Belgium may be I'll be danged he says, “and off ye go, Th’ three iv us clung together We might have been f it hadn’t been Th’ Wearin’ what Green—upon th’ Frinch hoorn, th’ fiddle and We wept for poor Belgium. Also for poor We wept for poor Italy, our brave ally, and played th’ Italyan nashn’l anthem, but a good part iv it was Full sivin verses gurgled away whilst I was gettin’ me hand on it. * Poor Serbia!” “Cursed be he who will not play a verse for poor “No wan can Portugal— wen by J.K. Buvase “Haven't you finished dressing yet, Marion?” “For goodness’ sake, John, don't bother me! tell you an hour ago that I'd be ready in a minute? Serbia, our brave ally!” dhrink a verse tv’ poor Serbia. ‘And poor Portugal!” th’ man who'll not anthem a verse iv dhrink t’ brave Didn't 1 says th’ other lad. “Come says th’ other lad. “Woe ¢ “And poor Siam! Who wud not verse a dhrink iv anthem t’ brave ally Siam? “And Japan? We'll all stand up and Japan a dhrink iv verse t’ our brave ally Anthem.” Unforthnitly that was th’ last we could honor standin’ up, so we sat down and versed a few Cubas iv an- them t’ our brave ally Dhrink. And then we allied a few anthems iv Greece to our brave dhrink iv Verse. We then Frinch hoorned a few honors t’ our brave allies Russt&@ and Montenegro, comicbooks.com