Judge — December 28, 1918 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

sass {ite see: a Py fees = tons arse seer what off the subject. I merely mentioned shirts be- cause most philanthropists wear them. People who hate waiters and hat boys spread a lot of anti-tipping propaganda, but you can’t get these safety first philanthropists to pass up their favorite f It’s a case of give or get, and the odds are against them from tHe table to the street. One of those old-time philanthropists ought to en- dow a special booby-hatch for the safety first species who hand the waiter the price of a new dinner gown for his wife. The oldtimers are so disgusted with this wave of foolishness that they've stopped giving libraries and hospitals. Henry’s even raised the ante on his tin liz- zies. Mr. Dubb feels like a piker when he hands the waiter a dollar tip, but when he buys a war saving stamp Mrs. Dubb has to put a gusset in his vest. Camouflaging Cupid Sillicus—I really believe her only reason for marrying him was to cut out her rival. Cynicus—Yes, no doubt it is easier for a woman to love a man than to let some other woman love him # by C.D, Barewezon Air AIR is a peculiar substance which we have on all sides of us whether we want it or not—like credi- tors. It extends fourteen miles above us, but so far has been entirely sufficient, although air shipping may necessitate its being extended. Air is the cheapest thing we have. Enough to last a lifetime is thrown in with every town lot we buy, Air changes its tempera- ture according to the seasons, although hot air may be generated during any season. There is also an air pro- duced by instruments, vocal cords, cats, and so forth. This kind of air should be treated by itself. Wind is air with a determination to get somewhere else as quickly as possible. The wind idea originated in Chi- cago and is rapidly being taken up in other parts of the country. Instruments constructed for the purpose show that the air moves much more briskly during campaign year than during any other. Fresh air is air that has just been made and not yet been sampled. Students of the geography class should seek diligently to discover the places where fresh air abounds. Horrid Thing! “Pardon me! Miss Peachy Tickle, is it not?” suavely asked ler Gloom I am Miss Pansy replied the young lady. “But the mistake is natural Every one says I look a great deal like my sister.” “Ah, yes! And does your sister look as much like you?” All Sorts “Things seem crowded here in Switzerland.” “Yes, sir,” said the landlord, “they are.” * All sorts of people about.” “Quite so, sir. Do you mind rooming with an ex-King?” Ominous Then “Isn't it. pleasant to see a light in the window as you draw near home?” “Not at three A.M.” The Will to Perfection “Tsee a movie man is filming Shakespeare. “Has he provements? Je many im- The Obstacle “IT un'erstood that yo’ was cipherin’on marryin’ ag’in, sah?" “T was, sah, but how could I? I done loaned muh plug-hat to Brudder Bogus to w’ar to de revival over at Blackburg—de hat dat I allus gits mar’d in, sah—and de scoun’el isn’t never “Come On, Customers! A Cent a Loox!” brung it back twell plumb yit!” | | comicbooks.com