Judge, 1918-12-07 · page 11 of 32
Judge — December 7, 1918 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Judge Magazine Page This page contains three separate nostalgic/humorous pieces typical of Judge's satirical format: **"Recollections"** (top left): A memoir about childhood Christmas presents, mocking how parents restrict children's enjoyment—a hand-washing requirement before viewing an illustrated book, a homemade wheelbarrow immediately repurposed for labor. **The cartoon** (center): Shows a child and father discussing a movie. The child thinks a death scene was fake; the father cynically suggests a censor actually censored the letter the child wrote to Santa, preventing him from receiving an automobile. This satirizes both childhood naiveté and film censorship practices of the era. **"A Christmas Letter"** (right): Sentimental verse about children writing Santa, ultimately requesting only their father's presence—touching sentimentality masking the era's economic hardship. **"Found in a Bottle"** (bottom right): An adventure parody where the narrator exhaustedly retrieves a mysterious bottle from the sea, only to find it contains the cynical con-artist phrase "There's one born every minute"—mocking gullibility and the human tendency toward self-deception. The page emphasizes Christmas themes mixed with satirical commentary on American life, consumerism, and human folly.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Recollections By Liste Vas Every EARLY every grown thinks back to some other Christmas time and wonders about some of the presents he got. Once wt © we were a small boy, received a nice picture- book It was all right, only we were instructed to wash our hands first, every time we wanted to look in it at the Indians and things. \ kid down the street a couple doors from where we lived hung up a horn on a church Christmas tree. We i know it was him, because he hurried up the next morning to tell us about it, also to blow on the horn until he was ordered out of the house by mother. A home-made wheelbarrow from father appealed to us until father made the alarming discovery that it would hold five sticks of stove-wood from the pile at the back end of the lot. Although quite young at the time, we were too well along in years to play at work of any kind. Drown by Cauvext Sarru Look here, dad! “That part where they hang the spy in the last fillum is just afake, ‘They don’t really kill “Are ye sureo’ that?) Gee! I'mg >in’ to git me money back.”” I want to “I've a suspicion, son, that some censor held up that letter!” ow why I didn’t get that automobile I wrote to Santa for?” A Christmas Letter OTS of trusting little children, just when Christmas comes around, Write a note to old Kris Kringle telling him what gifts to bring. Frequently, I've heard this method has by little ones been found Most successful, in securing dolls, drums, boats and everything. It is somethi: Tam wis! It is beautiful and priceless, though it’s not some costly st There is nothing that is like it; it’s not found on a elf If you'll be my Santa Claus, dear, grant me one thing for my own Place a stamp upon your forehead and please send me just yourself Found in a Bottle By Waiter G HAT was the small object floating on the bay? It was coming closer. Presently I could make out that it was a bottle. Some current was bringing it directly toward me. I waited. Suddenly the current changed and bore the bottle seaward. Then it occurred to me that probably the flask contained a message of some kind. “Tt would be a shame to let it go,” I thought. “No doubt some shipwrecked sailor has placed a word in it. It may contain some story of distress, an appeal for help.” So I plunged from the rocky shore and swam with all my might. I gained inch by stubborn inch upon the bottle. The current was swift and it took all my strength to make appreciable progress. At last, when I was almost completely exhausted, I reached the bottle and grasped it firmly. Proudly I bore it back to shore. Sure enough, there was a message inside. It read: “There’s one born every minute.” Dory comicbooks.com