Judge — October 26, 1918 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

[— ee Lise Witte Digest of the Worlds Hanor est Thoughts from dc ff Ms db —] | | | & =I YANKS Native Wit—During the recent fight ing on the Marne front a young Yankee bugler still in his teens was unfortunate enough to fall in German hands. Be- lieving that some useful information might be obtained from the lad he was brought before some German officers for questioning. “Who are you, my lad?” rman officer. “An American bugler,”” lad “Oh!” said the officer. little test.” ‘Blow taps,” said the officer. The lad obeyed. “Now, blow reveille,”” he commanded. The bugler did. “Sound retrea tid the German Never heard of it,” replied the lad. Wall Street Journal. said the snapped the “Now for a No Thought of Self—‘ Josh writ that he's fighting hard for a speedy vic- remarked Farmer Corntossel. commented his wife, “that y's got the right spi He's going to do his duty and wind up the war, al- though he knows perfectly well that as soon as it’s over he'll have to go right back to school.” —Washington Star. Impressionistic Portraiture—Mike, a New Yorker who never lost his brogue. was “Over There” with the A. E. F and his two companions happened to be an Englishman and a Scotsman. These two gave their Yankee friend a lively time with their jokes and teasing. One day Mike was called away, and left his coat hanging ona nail. The Eng- lishman and Scotsman, ‘ing some white paint near, ed the opportunity of painting a donkey’s head on the back of Mike's coat. The latter soon returned, and looking first at his coat, and then fixing his eye on his fellow fighters, said slow] Be- gorra! and which of you two has wiped your faceon my coat?”’—London Chronicle. you wl ing plac The Wrong, Wrong Trail Germa to Paris! oulu venir dans une cille d' “Why are insisted on coming to La B Hi! Wasn't it nnewte (Paris) water- Ludendorff—Well, the world’s round, isn’t it?—New of the World (L: j Ww ORDS Point of Interest—“This is the stadium.” “Fine. Now take us through the cur- riculum. They say you have a good one her Kansas City Journal The Reason—Possibly the reason why dictionaries are made in one large. ponderous tome instead of several small handy volumes is that magnitude enhances the respect for authority that a dictionary must have. One hesitates to disagree with a fifteen-pound book. Chicago News. Progressive Pantaloonacy — We'd give our very pants To France—Ohio State Journal. That is love's sublimest height Though the pants would be too tight Toledo Blade. Brave soul! He proffers all his riches, Who gives his only pair of breeches Marion Star. If All French Were as Easy—The French word * "isa freak of a word, though its freakishness is slightly marred by the matter of singular and plural. Spell it backwards and you have its mean- ing in English.—Boston Transcript. Telegraphy—One never tires of mar- veling at what telegraphy can do toa me: sage. An up-state correspondent was queried about a coal boat going aground, and the bewildering reply came back: “Can find nothing about coal boat drowned.” But the prize is taken by the message sent from Detroit signed by the sender’s nickname “Tude.” “Meet me at 10:05 train. Tude. It arrived: leet me at 10:05 train. Nude.”"—Detroit News. Paw Knows Everything—Wilie— Paw, what fs meant by straitened cir- cumstances? Paw—Straitened circumstances is high- brow language for being down and out, my son.—Cincinnali Enquirer. comicbooks.com