Judge — October 26, 1918 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

This Has An Erie Sound “What time will t “Don’t know, except AUTOS He Was Comforted—* How did the shortage of gasoline affect you?” “Well,” replied Mr. Chuggins, “it a kind of comfort to know offhand ex- actly why the old wouldn’t run.”—Washi machine car of His Wife—Redd—That ¢ of my wife every time Like mine reminds n I use it Greene—Oh, indeed. “Yes; it has such beautiful lines.” “Oh, I you were going to. say '—Yonkers S. n. thought perhaps because was always ‘knocking Half Speed—He was one of those fellows who are always in a hurry, and the tor-bus was one that refused to be hustled. It crawled up the hill like a tank at about two miles an hour. “Hi, driv said the ill-tempered man, spitefully, “we are not going to a funeral, you know.” “You're right, mister,” replied the driver, “we ain't. And we ain’t goin’ to a fire neither. ondon Tit-Bits. The Needy—She—I can’t get a new hat because the children need new shoes He—In the same boat. She—Why, you have no children. He—No, but I can’t get a new suit be. cause my auto needs new tires.—Boston Transcript. La Ba Some Car (describing accident)—It fell over that cliff up there. There ain’t a scratch on the car, but the Spectator people were injured something frightful Enthusiastic Motorist—Wonderful, by Jove! t’s the make of the Sidney (Austri WAR She Knew Her Place—A woman, one of 30,000 British working for the Y.M.C. A., was assigned to scrub the Eagle Hut floor in London. She had done little manual work in her life, but accepted the job without protest and went down on her knees with a pail of hot water, a cloth and a cake of soap. Soon the water in the pail was black. \ man in uniform passed. The woman looked up and asked if he would mind ptying the pail and refilling it with clean water. There was a pause, then this reply “Dammit, Madam, I’m an officer This time there was no pause, but like 1 flash the scrubwoman retorted: “Dammit, officer, I’m a duchess!"’— Issociation Men. A Bare Sense of Courtesy—Happy is the sense of humor of the sailor. Sev- eral times cach week we are inspected for indications of measles or scarlet fever. As the first sign is a rash on the stomach it is here that we are inspected. There T first sees the visiting then comes the and we fall into shirts is a ery by whoe surgeon of “ Attentio word, “ Belly inspection, line, and with our blouses and pulled up above our breeches march past the doctor. It was a Texan who, with a fine disregard for t striped surgeon, secured from the cloth h as we use with black with e majesty of our gold ing depot a paper stencil, su to mark our clothing, and paint lettered his bare stomach “Good morning, doctor.” Therearetimes ghs.—Jose ph Hub- when even an officer la bard in the A Considerably Softened—* This war is dreadful.” “So it is,” replied Mr. Dubwaite, “but it has made a neighbor out of me.” “How is that? “The young man who used to practice on the cornet morning, noon and night in a hall bedroom across the street has been decorated for gallantry France. If he ever comes home and wants to re- sume practicing I won’t say a word.” Birmingham Age-Herald. better What it Means—* Pop?” “Well, son—"" “What is meant by the theater of wa e The theater of war, dlaying most of our ‘tank? y son, is where we are now dramas. gstown Telegram comicbooks.com