Judge — March 9, 1918 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

| BUSINESS In the Wrong Line—* Your hard- luck story is one of the most affecting I have ever heard.” “Thanks, boss. small donation?” “No.” “But you just said——” “Exactly. - A man with your imagina- tion and gift of narration ought to be able to male a great deal of money as promo- ter. There is no earthly excuse.”’— Birmingham Age-Herald. Then you'll give me a Proper Place—‘‘The bookkeeper and the stenographer seem to be in love with each other.” “Um.” “See them sitting at that desk billing and cooing.” “Well, that’s the Kansas City Journal. billing desk.”— Pretty Good Rent—‘The village wiseacres used to say that Flubdub had rooms for rent in his upper story.” “Did he fool ’em?” “Looks like it. He’s rented ‘em to a corporation for $10,000 a year. That is to say, they’ve hired him for their law department.”—Omaha News. | JOURNALISM | Why the Editor Left Town—Mrs. iller read an article on “ Personal ” Seventeen were _present.— From the Boone (Ja.) News-Republican The first fall meeting of the Ladie: Matinée Musicale will be hell in the Central Christian Church, Saturday afternoon at 2:30 o’clock.—The Columbus (Ind.) Republican. Mr. Roberts went to Kansas City with a car of hogs. Several of the neighbors went in together to make up the car.— From the Jola (Kan.) Register. Financial Depression—A great deal is being said nowadays about ‘money being close.” This may be true, but the editor of the Times has not found it to be true. Precious little of it gets close enough to us to be within our reach.— Thomaston (Nev.) Times. Rivaling the Sirens “A voice like yours ought not to be wasted in street singing.” “What could I do with it, s “Well, it might be used for air raid warn- Snark's Annual (London). ings. Our Honest Confession—Yes, we went to the movies at Wilkesbarre last Wednesday. There was nothing in crea- tion to call us to that town but the mo ies, and we went and enjoyed it. We believe in telling the truth, and will not try to crawl out by saying that we hap- pened to be there on business and dropped in while waiting for a train.—Dushorc (Pa.) Sullivan Review. In Justice to Ourself—It takes a hustler for the newspaper business in this locality just now, but The Bugle is equal to the emergency. We can write a poem, discuss the tariff, umpire a ball game, report a wedding, saw wood, beat a law- yer, describe a fire so that the readers will shed their wraps, make a dollar do the work of ten, shine at a soirée, address a horticultural society, measure calico, abuse the liquor habit, test whisky, sub- scribe to charity, go without meals, at- tack the free silver, defend bimetalism, sneer at snobbery, wear diamonds, invent advertisements, overlook scandal, praise babies, delight pumpkin raisers, minister to the afflicted, heal the disgruntled, fight to a finish, set type, mold opinion, sweep the office, praise the widows, run for office, speak at prayer mecting, and stand in with everybody and everything. Tamarora (Idaho) Bugle. Visit from Uncle Hank—Uncle Hank Stepum walked into our office yes- terday and paid his yearly subscription with a barrel of turnips. We had a mess for dinner, juicy and toothsome as possum meat. Call again, Uncle Hank.—The Tennessee Eagle. A Card of Thanks—Mr. and Mrs. Fred Schreur wish to sincerely thank their many friends who so kindly assisted in the late sickness and death of their infant child.—Copemish (Mich.) Courier. Standardized Footgear Das verdnderte Bild der Bahnnofstrasse. Main Street as it used to be, and as it is now.—Nebelspalter (Zurich). comicbooks.com