Judge, 1917-08-18 · page 15 of 28
Judge — August 18, 1917 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two satirical pieces from *Judge* magazine about marriage and social life circa 1910s-1920s. **"At the Tacoma, Washington, Golf and Country Club"** (top): A brief joke about how courtship differs from marriage. Two women gossip that a couple must be secretly married because the man's behavior at golf has changed—he now criticizes his wife's game rather than gallantly helping her search for lost balls. The satire: romance dies quickly after marriage; husbands stop performing. **"The Notion Counter"** (below): A collection of witty social observations about American life—observations that still land today. They mock: penny-pinching hospitals, regional differences (Kansas City girls' smiles vs. Chicago girls' feet size), the high cost of living, women's contradictory shopping habits, Pittsburgh's pollution, and marital discord. The final cartoon joke (bottom right) is a visual pun: a dog about to be caught by dog catchers—"Too bad about poor old Spot being nabbed" / "Yes, it is a dog gone shame!" The humor relies on gentle social criticism and wordplay typical of early 20th-century American magazines aimed at middle-class readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
AT THE TACOMA, WASHINGTON, GOLF AND COUNTRY CLUB Rose—I'm sure they've been married secretly. Estelle—Why? Rose—Well, two weeks ago if she drove into the rough, he'd spend half-an-hour looking for her ball; now he just says “Confound it, can't you keep on the course?” The Notion Counter By DOUGLAS MALLOCH HOSE who are always put ona soup diet are a patient in a hos- pital just recovering from an operation and a small boy in a diner with his mother. There will always be a few of us in this world who invariably pick out the place on the sidewalk where the band doesn’t play. A neighboring tailor is advertising a sale of uncalled-for suits. There are a lot of them that seem entirely so. Paid a dollar for a taxi the other day to make a call and then when I got there she was out in the back yard. Most people don’t let religion take any of the joy out of life, and most of the rest don’t let it put any in. I would hate to have a man steal my wife, and next to that I put the man who s on my white shoes. ny married man can tell you that Satan isn’t the only one who finds some- thing still for idle hands to do. They laugh at the size of a Chicago girl’s feet, but did you ever see a Kansas City girl smile? If the high cost of living keeps up, soon we won't be able to afford even food for thought. Why is it that when a woman plans on getting a silk dress she always thinks of a blue one first? Cleanliness may be next to godliness in some places but in Pittsburgh it is next to impossible. Advances in candy and flowers have added materially to the high cost of living without her. You must admit that motoring and golf have been conversational godsends to some intellects. If I wanted to pick out a jolly life it wouldn’t be that of the wife of a rich farmer. Some women are so big that, if I married one of them, I would feel like a bigamist. A man likes to make a fool of him- self over a woman just to show his sincerity. Marriage is like a table d’hte—not exactly what you expected, but it will do. When some women play five hundred it takes them an hour to pass a given point. As far as the iron cross is concerned, I never saw a woman do it any other way. If what people don’t know won’t hurt them, a lot of us are pretty safe. People still try to slay each other with the jawbone of an ass. Spot being nabbed by the dog catchers.” “Yes, it is a dog gone shame!”