Judge, 1917-02-24 · page 13 of 28
Judge — February 24, 1917 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct pieces of satirical content: **"At the Augusta Country Club"**: A brief joke about strict golf course etiquette. The humor lies in the exaggerated enforcement—posting guards to prevent people from walking on the greens is absurdly rigid, even for an exclusive country club. The satire mocks upper-class pretension and overwrought rule-enforcement. **"Their Moderation"**: A longer commentary on small-town newspaper rivalry. A Missourian observes that two competing county-seat newspapers have been viciously attacking each other for so long they're now exhausted ("fagged out"). The satire ridicules provincial journalism's petty feuds and inflammatory language. **"Godspeed!"**: A romantic melodrama about a wife wishing her husband well as he departs. A telegram meant for him arrives late, creating dramatic irony—it's from a woman named Lilly, signed ambiguously. The story plays on period anxieties about infidelity and miscommunication, likely concluding with misunderstanding. The "He Wondered" Adam vignette jokes about whether an apple boycott could have prevented humanity's fall—light biblical humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
AT THE AUGUSTA (GA.) COUNTRY CLUB Anne They're very strict here about keeping people from walking over the greens, aren't they ? Nan THEIR MODERATION 66"PHE TWO weekly newspapers at the county seat ‘pear to be getting right friendly towards cach gther, yur of late. considering what they h been for a long time,” commented the venerable Missourian. or the last month or so the editor of the Torch of Liberty and Tocsin of the Times hasn't called the editor of the Progressive Farmers’ Vindicator and Faithful Guardian of the Home and Fireside much of anything but a gourd-headed monstrosity, a doddering fossil, a self-convicted liar and a natural-born thief, while the latter hasn't come back with a great deal except a little something about the pitiful imbecile and grotesque travesty on manhood, down the street, who pollutes the air with his noisome presence. 1 rec- kon they have been at it so long that they are beginning to feel sorter old and fagged out.” He Wondered Adam considered the cost of the apple. Wonder if a two- week boycott would have done any good,” he mused, Yes. They're posting men and women, too, for wearing of the greens. GODSPE ED! AUDE LAN G ed her jovial, ruddy-faced husband affectionately as he departed to catch the train that made connection with the outgoing liner. “Be careful, Don,” she whispered, clinging to his coat lapels, ‘bon voyage, dear, and—and Godspeed!” As the big car whirled him out of her sight, she wished that he had not appeared quite so buoyant, so carefree, so seemingly cager to be w ‘The telegram missed him by but twenty minutes. As she read it a chill enveloped her heart. The typed slip burned in its message as she read it agai nd at the irony of the thing her lips curled in a bitter smile. It contained but seven words: Lilly. Will meet you at the pier. Ispeed!”” rkham held her hand anor. Indeed, was it And she had wished him “G A few evenings later, when Paul M he perceived no reluctance in her dem not invitation he read in her eyes? Although he knew that his partner had missed his wire, " Hardwick did not know that the operator, hard- —C. M. Carlisle. “Bill pressed, had erroneously signed it “Lilly.”