Judge, 1917-02-03 · page 20 of 28
Judge — February 3, 1917 — page 20: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily advertising with a serialized fiction story. The main narrative, "Five Triple A," depicts young society characters navigating class anxieties in the early 20th century. **The satire:** Oswald is an obsessively fastidious upper-class man—his entire wardrobe (socks, tie, kerchief) matches in sky-blue with embroidered butterflies. He kneels on an elaborate handkerchief to protect his clothes. The joke targets pretentious gentlemen's excessive concern with appearance and propriety. **The social commentary:** Sarandella mocks Oswald's shame about inheriting wealth requiring only four weeks of "manual labor" to claim. She sardonically calls this a "distinction" rather than humiliation—satirizing wealthy young men's anxiety about appearing idle or undeserving of inheritance. The narrative mocks both aristocratic fastidiousness and the anxiety surrounding old-money privilege during an era of growing class tension.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Buy Your Tires At Factory Prices All you need to know about the tires you buy is how much they cost and how long they will last. KIN pant Buckskins are sold direct at prices which are “the lowest in America.” They are cheap in price only, Hundreds of Buckskin users get much more than the 4000-Mile Guarantee And of the thousands we sold last year only 4-10 of one per cent came back for ad- justment. We pay ex- Pressage. Write today for details of our low-price offer to car owners. 7 LEARN MUSIC AT HOME! New Method—Learn to Play By Note —Piano, Organ, Viells, pani, Man- dolin, Cornet, Harp, ’Cello, Guitar, Piccolo, Clarinet, Trombone Plute, or to sing. Special Limited Offer of free weekly lessons. You pay only (or music and stage, which is No extras, fon back guar- iced pupils. rything illustrated. in, simp'e, systematic. Lectures given with each course. 16 years’ success. Start at once. Write for Free Booklet Today—N U. S. SCHOOL OF MUSIC, Box 282 225 Fifth Avenue, New York City DUNLOP GOLF BALLS woy the choice of champions! I 1917, sional James M. B: 1» 1916 American cha: DUNLOP RUBBER CO., Ltd. Birmingham, England THE LANDON SCHOOL 1483 Sehofleld Rolidiog, C WANTED AN IDEA! le thing to patent? w wealth. | Write for « Patent and Patent Attorneys, Dept. WHO CAN THINK OF SOME Protect your ideas, they, may bring ind “How to “Five Triple A” O OSWALD got down on his knees. He was not the kneeling kind. Far from it. He was an upright young man. Where- 1 with reluctance his faultlessly creased nether vestment against the hard floor. Not, however, that his knees—or, rather, the wool that was pulled over them —came tangibly in contact with it. Oh, no! Oswald had taken precautions. Oswald al- ways took precautions. The time h lege mates playfully removed his lavender socks, he had taken precautions in the form of a reserve pair of—however, that is an- other story. Oswald’s precautions in this instance were in the nature of a sky-blue mouchoir. Oswald's socks were sky-blue; Oswald’s tie was sky-blue; so, of course, Oswald’s ker- chief was sky-blue. Such was Oswald’s construction. Not only was it sky-blue, but it had embroidered on it dainty pink butterflies, blissfully chasing one another over the cloudless sky-blue sky. Oswald's precaution was spread out upon the floor directly in front of the sofa. And on the sofa sat Sarandella. Sarandella was not peculiarly attractive; but she was Sarandella. Therefore Oswald liked her. Nay, more; he cherished her. He cherished her as he cherished his mutton chops at breakfast, with the same Platonic affection. Sarandella knew this. She revelled in the fact. Had the necessity (Heaven for- bid!) arisen, he would have sacrificed the matutinal luxuries for her. Dear altruistic Oswald! Sarandella spoke: “* Humiliation?’ Pouf! Little Osie is humiliated because his father died and left him a legacy which he must work four weeks to get? Four weeks of man- ual labor in exchange for half a million! ‘Humiliation?’ Twaddle! it’s a distinction! Look here: ‘BAILEY BAGS BOODLE! * Young Society Lion Earns Benes! nd the Sweat of Hie Brow . “Oh, bla-ast the sweat of my brow!” and... and . . and wins the She looked down at him and blushed. He looked up at her and blushed. They blushed simultaneously. They blushed alternately. Oswald fumbled with the shoe horn that still hung between the low patent leather and her dainty silk clad foot. Sarandella was the first to speak: “Show me a half size larger, please; this one is a bit too tight!”—Ayron Zobel. Fully Equipped “No,” said the philosophical hermit, “I have never felt the need of a wife. You see, I have a talking machine and an un- governable temper.” Quite So “The Japanese language has seven syn- onyms for I.” “Some of our public speakers have long felt that our own language is sadly defi- cient in that respect.” John H. Patterson is the man who has made the building of the world’s cash registers a joy to the men and womenwhomake them. His story appears in this week’s Leslie’s. B.C. Forbes tells the life of this business-idealist as the twenty-eighth chapter of the “Men Who Are Making America.” 10° Leslie's Minted Wiel Now pant Special features like this, beside the departments on trade, travel, finance, motors, sports and current events, have built up for Leslie’s the largest circulation of any $5-a-year weekly in the world. Leslie's Illustrated Weekly Newspaper 225 FIFTH AVENUE NEW YORK CITY comicbooks.com