Judge, 1916-09-30 · page 5 of 28
Judge — September 30, 1916 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine features "Clubhouse Conversations," a satirical dialogue about political reform. The sketch depicts well-dressed men debating democratic governance in what appears to be a gentlemen's club setting. The "Duffer" proposes regulating society through bathing habits—a absurdist critique of overly simplistic reform ideas. The "Scratch Man" counters with another impractical scheme: giving every adult male votes equal to his annual baths, implying poor hygiene correlates with poor citizenship. The satire mocks naive reformers who believe mechanical solutions (voting adjustments, cleanliness standards) can fix complex political and social problems. The dialogue suggests that progressive-era reform proposals often lacked practical grounding, reducing serious democratic questions to ridiculous formulas. The cartoon ridicules both utopian thinking and class-based assumptions about who deserves political participation.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
NOT WORTH THE RISK ~ Why, Edith’s marriage was simply stupid, considering his income. CONVERSATIONS CLUBHOUSE Really she might as well have married someone she knew.” The Duffer Proposes Political Reform Through the Medium of the Bath EMOCRACY “is a failure. : Scratch Man looked up from the pages of the golf- magazine he was perusing, but evinced no further interest. The New Member languidly signalled a passing waiter, and ordered cooling refreshments, but made no other sign of attention The Duffer was unabashed. “ Democracy. he louder tone, “is a failure failure. “Yes?” mildly interrogated the New Member. “I think you pronounced The accent is on the antepenultimate “i “You know what I mean,” said the Duffer. “1 One man isn’t as good as said the Duffer in a tone of intense sorrow, repeated in a a pronounced it correctly “Shut up. mean that the theory is wrong. another.” “Oh! You think not?” you'd spread that doctrine husky bricklayers, or blacksmiths. would send flowers.” “But they aren’t equal,” persisted the Duffer. “On what grounds?” Well—everyone isn’t equally clean, for one thing.” said the Scratch Man. “1 wish Spread it before a crowd of nice, The New Member and I “Oh—then you would regulate things on a cleanliness “By George, that’s an idea!” exclaimed the Duffer. “1 admit that you usually aren't aflicted with many of that sort of thing, but you really hit something there. A universal Democracy run on a cleanliness basis!) That would be some- thing like! “How yould you, in your infinite wisdom, regulate it?” stid the Scratch Man. “Well, it would be this way. Every man over twenty-one should have a number of votes equal to the number of baths he took yearly.” “What! houted his audience. “LT mean it. Thus a man would regulate his power in the community by his method of living. I defy any man to remain ignoraat and brutal under the refining influence of the daily bath. Our country would become spotless—our inhabitants would walk abroad in the high consciousness of bodily white ness: sd “Redness,” interrupted the New idea how that yellow soap scratches.” ‘—Politics would be purified, the Millennium would arrive well ahead of schedule, Utopia would be achieved in a flash is “In a splash, you mean,” said the Scratch Man. “What I want to know is, how are you going to prove that people bathe Member. “You've no comicbooks.com