Judge, 1916-09-30 · page 4 of 28
Judge — September 30, 1916 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct sections: **"Editorials" (top):** Satirical illustrations of figures in exaggerated costumes and poses, likely caricaturing contemporary political or social figures, though specific identities are unclear from the image alone. **"Nothing is handsomer than a face" (left column):** An essay about facial expressions and character, discussing how faces reveal personality. This appears to be general commentary rather than political satire. **"Utility" (bottom):** A brief comedic exchange between characters named Martini and Desmond about wedding presents and married life, presented as humorous social observation rather than political commentary. The page mixes satirical illustrations with general humor and social commentary typical of Judge magazine's blend of political and lifestyle content. Without clearer identification of the figures or publication date, specific political references remain unclear.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Faces OTHING is’ han- dier than a fa It is able to serve a great variety of pur- poses. Make one. Use the mirror, just like a real, sure-cnough actor when he is rehearsing his part alone. The straight face is a if good one for most prac- —/ -fy-— tical purposes, though of Q a discreet grin super- imposed is rarely unless, of course, the circumstani for a long face. When the latter is in or- der, the long has got to be a long one. None other will do, The charm of the face is due to the fact that nobody tell what is behind it. I phrenologists and the mind- readers don’t know. This is, no doubt, a pleasant mystery for us all, We are speaking of the mature varieties of faces, for as to the faces of children, that is a matter wholly different. The face of a child is some- thing too sweet and rare ever to be submitted to vulgar analy- sis. Unless some awkward grownup has succeeded in spoil- ing the spirit of a dear little girl or boy, that boy or girl wears a countenance that uplifts you and Dubonnet I me involuntarily whenever and wherever we see And it becomes our souvenir. But the hardened face is too versatile, for by all the rules it should settle down to immobility. Quite the contrary. It preserves instead hard mobility, a sort of decorous movie, marvelous if beheld at the exact moment of brief transition, but as that is difficult, the general effect is one of immobility. It is a phenomenon. The best definition of a face is a growth. With this definition in mind our human experience, both objec and subjective, becomes a never-ending source of stimu- lation, with possibilities far beyond computation, as shown by the facial register. UTILITY Martini—\ have never seen such an extraordinary variety of wedding presents as they have. Yes. The bride says they have enough material for bridge prizes to last them the rest of their married life. by Sixes and Sevens OLDING out for more than $25,000,- 000 for those Danish West Indies makes the King of Denmark at least five of the six best sellers. ¢ Man may be convinced that he is a miserable sinner, but there never were fewer false teeth sold for gnashing purposes than now. 2 Here’s your hat, Mr. Candidate. What's your hurry to talk through it? ¢ A presidential contest: without Gene Debs the Socialist. candidate and Gene Chaffin as the Prohi i look sort of hetereugencious. ¢ ‘To say you don’t know a person very well is usually a tactful way of saying you don’t like him.- Vale Record. There be those whom to like well if you know them is to scat truth on the tact. 2 cough” is the latest health slogan. ‘They'll be admon: ishing us to “don’t breathe” next —Buffalo Express Housebroken husbands who don’t “cough” daren’t breathe. e On the sale of those West Indies, Danish glee clubs split fifty fifty between “Sailing, Sail ing!” and “Isle take thee back.” “Don't comicbooks!