Judge — June 19, 1915 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

MANHATTAN BEA “SWEPT BY OCEAN BREEZES” NEW YORK'S MOST POPULAR AND FASHIONABLE RESORT BY-THE-SEA Temperature seldom varies from 70 degrees. Within the city limits, half hour by train. one hour by auto, Mercadante’s Concerts Tennis Courts Salling Outdoor Restaurant Surt Bathing Garage Deep Sea Fishing Oriental Hotel OPENS JUNE 24 EUROPEAN PLAN Thes Dansants Wednesday and Saturday afternoons, and Evening Dances. Dinner Dances at frequent intervals. Auto roads direct to hotel entrance JOSEPH P. GREAVES, Manager Vortda Telephones, 9230 and RAISE A LAUGH every time you show— THE SMALLEST FLY-KILLER In the World ends together and THE MAGIC SHOP, 20 N. 13th. St., Phile., Pa. ; We Buy O Drawings All Branches of or Local Classen, | Write for Ulustrated boo! bs Ww acevestal ASSOCIATED AIT STUDIOS, 2124 Flatiron Bid'g. N.Y. | green ana yellow The superb liqueur of the ages. Unvarying in char- acter — unsurpassed in ex- cellence, The Monks’ Famous Cordial » Cafés, At first-class Wine Merchants, Grocers, Hot Batjer & Co., 45 Broadway, New York. Sole Agents for United States. Stories with Smiles Frankly Admitted It—Some time ago a charming Bordentown girl went to the Jer. sey capital to spend a week with a young woman friend. While there she was in. duced to take part in a church bazaar and was given charge of the candy booth, Eventually a middle-aged man was led that way. “They tell me I must buy some candy," smiled the victim, picking up a box from the booth. ‘*How much is this?" ‘Five dollars,’’ answered the Borden. town girl, without any visible evidence of conscientious pangs. “Um,” thoughtfully returned the vic. tim, glancing from the candy to the girl, **Aren’t you a little dear?’" ““Well,”’ coyly rejoined the other, what all the Bordentown boys say. delphia Telegraph. The Victim—It was a wizened little man | who appeared before the judge and charged his wife with cruel and abusive treatment. His better half was a big, square-jawed woman, with a determined eye. “In the first place, where did you meet this woman who has treated you so dread- fully?"’ asked the judge. **Well,"’ replied the little man, making a brave attempt to glare defiantly at his wife, ‘I never did meet her. She just kind | of overtook me.'’ — Pittsburgh Chronicle. Telegraph. Better Yet—'‘Think of it,’ said the candidate, as he took the farmer's infant on his knee; ‘‘this boy, so small, so imma- ture, may live to become the President of our broad and enlightened republic!" ‘Nothing doing!"’ said the farmer harsh- ly. **That's a girl.” **Better yet!'’ cried the unabashed can- | didate. ‘*This girl may live to rule the man who rules the republic!’’—Cleveland Plain Dealer. Preparing To Retaliate—A long-haired | chap who walked into the general store at Arvada asked, **Do you sell stale eggs?” “‘No,"’ said the grocer, with a smile; “*but I've got some."" “Well, give me all you've got,’’ said the stranger. | The grocer, as he bundled up the eggs, laughed and said, ‘I guess you're going to see Hamlet to-night at the Opera House.” ‘*No,’’ said the stranger grimly. ‘‘I'm going to play Hamlet to-night at the Opera House.''—Field and Farm. As She No Doubt Would—‘‘Some day we'll be telephoning through the air with- out wires."” ‘*Maybe; but won't it be queer to have an operator call back to you and say, ‘The air is busy now’?""— Washington Star. A Heated Conversation **Maud,”’ I cried, resolved to chance her, “There are words I burn to say!" Then she made this cryptic answer, “All right, Charlie; blaze away.” —Magazine of Fun. And getting still warmer— “*Maudie, dear, my heart is kindling For a ‘match’ with you,"’ I said; “May I love you, woo you, win you?” | And she answered, ‘‘Fire ahead. —Hempstead Inquirer.