Judge, 1915-04-03 · page 7 of 24
Judge — April 3, 1915 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from Judge magazine contains several satirical pieces mocking early 20th-century social trends: **Main Cartoon (top):** A "fond mother" boasts her daughter can improvise any piano piece. The satire targets pretentious parents exaggerating their children's talents. **"Surgicalized":** This essay mocks the era's surgical obsession—appendectomies, tonsillectomies, mastoid operations, and cauterization became status symbols of "modern civilization." The piece sarcastically suggests people collect surgical scars as proof of being up-to-date. **Other pieces:** Brief comedic sketches about spring optimism versus winter reality, Easter fashions, and gender dynamics in marriage ("being a woman, I suppose you had to have it"). **Overall tone:** Gentle mockery of American middle-class aspirations, medical trends, and domestic life—typical Judge fare targeting educated, affluent readers aware of contemporary cultural pretensions.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Foud mother —Improvise > ‘Baby’ Buskirk—oh, say, do you remember “Baby’?’" ‘Baby’ with those golden curls! Oh, do 1?" **To the girls of our col- lege days!’’ said the grad with the hump, raising his stein on high. “Nix!'’ said the other. “Wait! Let's do it right! Waiter, bring us three quarts of champagne."’ —Fred Ladd. Do I? Spring “Oh, take a walk right away! The day is perfect!’ There's spring in the air—the fragrance of flowers! Such air! Such sky! Such sunshine !"’ “What are you saying? I have this mo- ment returned to the house from walking in slush! My feet are frozen! I'm chilled through and through! ‘Flowers — sun- shine!’ Are you crazy?”’ “Alas! What is to be done with folks that have no imagination?”’ The Easter Girl Though you may doubt her letters when She fashions kisses out of blots, Don’t doubt it was the speckled hen That laid the egg with polka dots. Another Thing “*Boobleby boasts that his wife made him all that he is."’ “That is not boasting; it’s apologizing."’ SS Poe = OL PONIES Gf ACHEP EM, A LET Why, my daughter can improvise any piece of music you put before her! Surgicalized Lox ago in the Dark Ages the Greeks marveled at the perfection of the human body. Poor Greeks! they little knew what perfection really was! Could they but see our bodies now! There are very few that cannot boast some reform skillfully wrought by the ver- satile surgeon. So prolific has been this reform that a worthy example of a human being has all the marks of identification of all the favorite operations of the period— the tattoo of our high civilization. He is a poor specimen indeed whose body surface cannot evidence well-defined, though perfectly healed scars follow- Striking It Right He (soulfully)—Don’t you often sigh for the wings of a bird, Miss Charmer? She (decidedly )—Indeed I do! some trimming for a new hat badly! An Easter Tribute If Cleopat’s new Easter hats Looked half as nice as yours, I don’t blame Anthony a bit For hugging—Egypt's shores, Taking Him Up “*I vowed I'd go anywhere for her.”* “Well?” **And then she sent me on my way 1 need ing all the major operations required to amend our primi- tively imperfect anatomy. What an army of survivors of appendicitis surgery we are! How our ranks augment as the days go by! And who of us has not yet had the mas- toid incision? It is sine qua non of one’s standing with medical authority. Who isso lost to progress as to retain his tonsils? Who so weak as to refuse his nose the cautery? Thus the inner man keeps pace with his exterior, and he can lay just claim to having an organism brought quite up to date —Juison M. Hinchthone. Wife—How do you like my new gown, dear? It's the last word, you know. , Hubby—Well, being a woman, I suppose you had to have it. comicbooks.com