Judge, 1914-10-17 · page 5 of 24
Judge — October 17, 1914 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains several unrelated satirical pieces: **Top photograph** ("He Who Does Not 'Hesitate' Is Lost"): Shows a theater scene, likely illustrating a story about a vaudeville manager named Mr. Harrison Von Bood who announced a soldier's war story to an audience. The caption suggests the piece mocks hesitation or indecision. **"A Wise Manager" / "Patchwork"**: Satirizes character development, comparing it to "piecing a crazy quilt"—suggesting people develop character haphazardly rather than systematically. **"Football Terms" illustration**: Shows three women labeled with football terminology (Quarter-back, Half-back, Full-back), making a joke comparing female anatomy or social positioning to football positions. **"Reason Enough" / "Worked Out" / "The Desired Result"**: Brief comedic dialogues about divorce grounds and women's social clubs—period humor about marital and social dynamics. The page appears to be a miscellaneous humor collection rather than unified satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A Wise Manager 6c Ti ERE we were, a big audi- ence in the house, and the back of the stage on fire,’’ said the vaudeville manager. “Mercy! What did you do?’’ asked Stlithers. “Why,’’ said the manager, ‘I went out before the curtain and announced that as an extra Mr. Harrison Von Boob had volun- teered to tell the audience the story of how he got from San Moritz to London after the war broke out, and in just three min- utes there wasn't a soul left in the house! Patchwork Most people get the idea from their clergyman that developing character is like molding a beau- tiful statue, when in reality it is* more like piecing a crazy quilt. Quarter-back. HE WHO DOES NOT “HESITATE” Half-back. FOOTBALL TERMS Reason Enough THE lawyer explained, ‘As a matter of course, You must state on what grounds you apply for divorce.’’ “T shall base application,’’ the lady began, “On the grounds that I find I have wed the wrong man.’’ Worked Out Mrs. Tittle—Why do you think of moving? Mrs, Tattle—I might just as well. I've found out all there is to know about my neighbors. The Desired Result “After all,"’ grumbled he, ‘I do not see that your women’s clubs accomplish anything of importance.’” ‘Why, goodness gracious !’’ re- plied she. ‘‘We get our names in the papers, don’t we?” comicbooks.com