Judge, 1914-04-11 · page 21 of 24
Judge — April 11, 1914 — page 21: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertisements and light satirical stories**, not political cartoons. The "Perfect Assurance" piece humorously contrasts historical figures (Cleopatra, Marie Antoinette) who worried about their appearance before important moments with modern women who could find confidence through "Smart Styles" magazine—a pitch for the publication itself. "Stories with Smiles" contains anecdotes mocking political figures: one ridicules President Wilson's "watchful waiting" policy toward Mexico (a real 1913-1914 policy) by suggesting it meant waiting for Americans to be killed before acting. Another celebrates a defense lawyer's emotional appeal securing an acquittal. The page is dominated by **product advertisements**: Vaseline Hair Tonic, Pears' Soap, and Art Pianos. The satirical content serves mainly as editorial filler between ads—typical for Judge's business model. The political humor assumes readers' familiarity with contemporary Mexican policy debates and legal proceedings.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Perfect Assurance Cleopatra, on the occasion of her interview with N GJ. Caesar, paused in the ante room to remark | J a a to her ‘attendant, ‘‘Are you sure my jewels are 5 ° ° ° cs on straight? hy well k Stoties ‘with Smifes Marie Antoinette, on an equally well known oc- aaion, apologized to the executioner for her A Westie itn cit — , say 2 privilege of a lady's s appearance, saying that the p' 8 y York Sun tells this story of ex-Repre- maid had been denied her. sentative W. P. Hepburn, of Iowa: | Neither of the two ladies was acquainted with This old warhorse of the old Republican Smart Styles. Could they have known “‘the| organization strolled into the Capitol. magazine of individuality,”’ their fears might ‘How about the Mexican policy of this have been allayed. ‘The perfect assurance that! — administration?”’ asked a newspaper man. sais comes from the consciousness of dress-distine- “You mean ‘watchful waiting’? asked shan tion would have been theirs. Unele Pete. sband | “Yes.” “Well, I'll tell you. So far as I can see, ‘watchful waiting’ consists of Mr. y gross Bryan watching to see the Mexicans kill another American, and then waiting for Carranza or Villa to produce the remains."” oe 7 Health-giving dressing for A Great Defense—The great advocate— th | let us call him Mr. McSweeney—was de- le scalp. fending a man in a murder case. The Prevents dandruff and falling of case looked hopeless, and McSweeney he hai submitted no evidence for the defense. the hair. So the public prosecutor, believing that . conviction was assured, ended with just a Gets right down to the roots few perfunctory remarks. and gives just the necessary Then, in a quiet, conversational tone, stimulation needed to keep the “Perfect gowning,”” an art that seems by right pier tage arava ait ad pera hair in perfect condition. to belong to a tavored few, is really at the der Bi described in vivid col. command of every woman who truly cares. murder. He just described in vivid col- For sale everywhere. ors a pretty country cottage hung with Time was when a Paris pocketbook was the horeysuckle, a young wife preparing sup- Send 10c for Trial Size Bottle key. Today, irrespective of the size of adress- per, and the rosy youngsters waiting at allowance, the ‘‘perfect costume’’ is within the the gate to greet their father on his re- CHESEBROUGH MFG. COMPANY reach of all. turn home for the evening meal. Sud- (Ceekan” denly McSweeney stopped. He drew him- ng SMART STYLES self up to his full height. Then, striking NUE State Street NewTek the table with his fist, he cried, in a voice THE MAGAZINE OF INDIVIDUALITY that thrilled every bosom, ‘Gentlemen, you must send him back at the by showing the most fetching costumes well in| home to them!’” SS advance of the mode, and by helping you adapt A red-faced juror choked and blurted them perfectly to your own personality, can| out, “‘By George, sir, we'll do it!”’ make your costuming a delight—smart, becom- McSweeney, without another word, sat ing, distinctive, truly economical. No ill- down, and ten minutes later the jury fact— chosen gowns or hats to regret, if you use| brought in a verdict of acquittal. : F Smart Styles. The prisoner wept as he shook his coun- Cleanliness is a neces- — the Smart Styles fs th ine % sel’s hand. ‘No other man on earth ‘ mart Styles is the necessary magazine for] could have saved me as you have done, sity that knows a law— vealth every woman who cares for dress-distinction. Mr. McSweeney,” he sobbed. ‘I ain't 3 The price is 25 cents a copy, but for the privi- Che wife ce family, atc" —Zondon Pears’ Soap. fs to lege of becoming acquainted, we will gladly] 7,0 9p ae Sens send you six issues for the price of four. sini Pears’ is born a law and ; Ivice, The space below is left empty for your use. Change of Scenery—She was only a i i Tear out the square, write init your Yame and| bride, and this was her first dinner party. a necessity for toilet and ;, but address, pin a dollar bill to it, and send it to| Her husband, a fire-prevention engineer bath. e our Smart Styles, 41 West 25th Street, New York,| and a graduate of Boston Tech, was to eii'teyetee ai for a six months’ subscription—a dollar invest- bring pone ane ly classrontes a = 7 pal men orfe i whose honor the little wife had planned Lead efor perfect: gownlng: “red dinner."” The candelabra shades Art Pianos were to be red. She would serve a to- mato soup as the first course, to be fol- lowed by red meat and baked potatoes at Wholesale ‘Yes, at the rock bottom price; tting sprinkled with paprika. The salad dress- any Artist Model yaa, select at ing and the dessert would likewise har- sclatals “on eperev al. | prepaid. <now monize with the color aces apie we 0 cans SroMOUF factory to you, Not a » dis- When the guests arrived, however, they a et oe 00 STONER OTEN: oD eee in a found everything in yellow. Saffron can- 30 Days’ FREE Trial! a lit- dle shades cast a golden glow over the fens wes a doeina to Nesp th pare Anat s ad- table. A clam bouillon was served as nano zoo can bare the first course, then a leg of lamb, pota- ited Offer! To,s4rrtin and cwiety, intra toh n in- GREAT BEAR SPRING WATER. “Ita Purity Has Made It Famous.” 30c per case of 6 glass stoppered bottles {acv.] tn answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated comicbooks.com