Judge, 1914-03-14 · page 13 of 24
Judge — March 14, 1914 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains several brief satirical jokes and a poem mocking vanity and social pretense in early 20th-century America. The main poem, "When the Rouge Begins To Show," attacks women's use of cosmetics—rouge, hair dye, and makeup—as deceptive performance. It argues that while youth can afford such artifice, aging women who continue applying makeup become pathetic figures, their "trick" exposed. The poem reflects period anxieties about female aging and authenticity. The shorter jokes mock various social types: a pretentious linguist who speaks only broken fragments of foreign languages; a man engaged but claiming not to know his fiancée (playing coy); rural versus urban courtship; and marital discord (a prisoner preferring jail to his wife). The cartoon titled "Bulk Ignored" shows a well-dressed society woman being snubbed by guests—satirizing either her social pretensions or her physical appearance. Overall, the page targets dishonesty, vanity, and social climbing through humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
He—Oh, pardon me, my dear Mrs, Plumpleigh-Fatton, I didn’t see you till now. When the Rouge Begins To Show O# THE cheek of youth has a satin weave, And the cheek of age is dough! And there’s nothing Cl on earth we love like beauty, And there’s nothing we hate so much as duty; But it’s childish to play at make-believe When the rouge be- gins to show. What a trick it is to brighten the hair And daub the cheeks with an extra glow, When hair is young and the strands are silky, And the flesh is firm and deliciously milky! But, oh, it’s a pitiful sort of snare When the rouge begins to show! Your chance is past—oh, you poor old clown! The gallery calls, ‘‘Bravissimo!’’ Go search for a job that’s more be- fitting— And ingle nook and a bag of knitting; For it’s time to turn the calciums down When the rouge begins to show! —Jane Burr. He seeks relief in vain who will not follow advice. BULK IGNORED Exposed Bustum—Young Brightly seems to be quite a linguist. Gustum—Linguist nothing! He’s a four-flusher! All he speaks is a little table-d’hote French, a few snatches of grand-opera Italian, a smattering of to- bacco and cigar Spanish, and a word or two of beer-garden German, Love Blind Rustum—You know Miss De Koy very well, don’t you? Van Swain—No. Rustum—What? I thought you were engaged to her? . van Swain—So I am. She—Now, now, flatterer! A Warning S4D Mabel of the country lanes to Percy of the city, b As from his coat she saw him blond hairs flickin’, “If you don’t shake that other hen, that silly, light-haired biddy, Young man, you sure will lose your prairie chicken!’" The Explanation “She says she never borrows trouble.’’ “No; that’s a thing she prefers to give."” A Knock He—I'm well pleased with myself. She—You're satisfied with very little. SOMETHING EVEN WORSE Warden—Your wife 's here to see ye. Prisoner (desperately) —Tell ‘er I'm out ! comicbooks.com