Judge, 1913-04-26 · page 20 of 24
Judge — April 26, 1913 — page 20: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertisements interspersed with satirical verse**. The main content, "Passing the Mustard: Visions of Bliss," uses dreams as satirical commentary on working-class anxieties and desires of the early 20th century. The poem mocks a laborer's fantasies: a full coal cellar, a serviceable overcoat, avoiding snow-shoveling, getting laundry done properly, a rare wage increase, affording a summer suit, cheaper ice prices, and—most tellingly—his wife leaving town. The final joke frames these dreams as so mundane and uninspiring that even the man's sleep-talk bores his wife, sarcastically suggesting his imagination reflects the dull monotony of working life itself. The surrounding ads (hotels, soap, fish lure) are typical Judge fare—commercial content alongside humor aimed at middle-class readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
WASHINGTON, D. C. “The Hotel of American Ideals.”” HOTEL POWHATAN Pennsylvania Ave., at 18th & H Sts. New, Fireproot. European Plan. Rooms, detached bath, $1.50, $2.00 upw. Rooms, private bath, $2.50, $3.00 upw. 100% Fire, Germ and Dust Proof. Two blocks from White House, and Near All Points of Interest. ‘Write for Souvenir Book: CUFFORD M. LEWIS “le E, with Map. Manager. Everyone admires a clear complexion. It’s an open secret that Pears’ Soap has brought the glow of health to millions of fair faces. Sold in America and every other country. like hungry wolves and keep you busy pulling them oat whenever or wherever you use cur GIC FISH LURE BAIT. HOTEL ALBERT 11TH STREET AND UNIVERSITY PLACE One Block West of Broadway NEW YORK CITY Close to Wholesale and Retail Goods Districts, Railroad and Lines MODERN ABSOLUTELY FIREPROOF 300 Rooms (200 with Bath) RATES $1.00 PER DAY UP Excellent Restaurant and Cate Moderate Prices ‘Send for tree Mustrated Guide and Map of New York City Passing the Mustard Visions of Bliss He had a dream, a joyous dream, That thrilled him to the soul; He stood, with a receipted bill, And watched a row of wagons fill His cellar full of coal. —Jupce. He dreamed again, a pleasant dream; His smile was great to view. His snoring struck a tuneful note, Because he thought his overcoat Was just as good as new. —Youngstown Telegram. He dreamed once more, a wondrous dream ; It brought a mental glow. He dreamed that for a price dirt cheap A neighbor had agreed to keep His sidewalk free from snow. —Denver Republican. Then came this rare old, fair old dream— A joy so keen it hurt. Existence took another tack ; He dreamed his laundry had come back With buttons on the shirt. —Waco News, But when he dreamed, another night, The boss had raised his pay, Because his hair was turning white And he'd always worked with all his might, He threw his pipe away. —St. Louis Post-Dispatch. He stirred and turned and dreamed again. Oh, joy—and bliss to boot! Enough he found inside his purse— And all derived from column verse— To buy a summer suit. —Nashville Banner. A hot night brought another dream That certainly was great; He dreamed the men that deal in ice Had all agreed to cut the price, And also give full weight. —Springfield Union. Again he dreamed, a dreamy dream; Then shook in violent glee. A missive on the table lay, Which said his spouse had gone away For a week or two, maybe. —Erie Dispatch. A Bore—‘‘She doesn’t think much of her husband.” No?” “No, She says even the things he says in his sleep are terribly dull and uninter- esting.""—Detroit Free Press. Tut, Tut!—‘*You will forgive me if I— er—ask you something—something’’—— “Sure I will! I knew you would be asking it soon."” “Ah, you know what I am about to ask you? Your heart has told you what’’—— “Sure! You're going to ask me what time the last car goes by ?’’— Houston Post. Sliced Oranges with a dash of Abbott's Bitters are appetizing and healthful. Sample of bitters by mail, 2ets.instamps. C. W. Abbott & Co., Baltimore, Md. Do you know a little baby just like this? Its jolly laugh is little always sweet to hear. The Bugville Book is the very thing for it. Make this baby happy with a copy. There are over 70 pages of the Ad- ventures of the In- habitants of Bug- ville—an endless source of entertain- ment. Even grown- ups will like it. We'll send this to you for just 10c. Judge 225 Fifth Ave. New Yor In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com