Judge — March 8, 1913 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

er, han der vik | Driftwood. An Attractive Figure. will not marry a man whose income at om a recent prec. pte than $10,000 What shall be said for colleges That teach their female scholars To balk at double harness quite Without ten thousand dollars? Money makes the mare to go,”” ne is a defaulter ims a rope of golden strands To lead her to the altar. A mate that’s hitched to Hymen’s car In mercenary marriage Will surely kick the traces o’er, Not help to draw the carriage. When wedded to the proper sum, No doubt she'll gayly burn it; But ladies with such large demands Should teach the men to earn it! —New York Tribune. Irrelevancies. A good wife is a man’s consolation, anda bad one his bachelor friend’s vin- dication. If you would move pity, weep! If you would move mountains, work! The wise man never lets the world know how simple he is. Never judge by appearances and al- ways remember that you will be judged by them! Secrecy with women consists in telling athing to only one person at a time. Through the path of friendship to love, yes. But never think to return by the same route! The emptiest man in the world is the one who is full of himself. If you haven't anything to say, don’t say it!—Chicago Inter-Ocean, Only One Guess Needed. Alvin Hornberger, who was wanted for passing forged notes, was traced by the marks of his false teeth in an unfinished cheese sandwich. Guess where this hap- pened. America? Right!—Punch (Lon- don). Because. —Son— Why do people say “Dame Gossip’? Father—Bi e they are too polite to leave off the '— Vermont Crabbe. Of Course. —Mike—Why do thim false ayes be made of glass, now? Pat—Shure, an’ how else could they see throo 'em, ye thick-head? — Yale Record. Her Only Squeeze. —Ada—I wonder why she wears such tight gloves? Eva—That's the only way she can get ber hand squeezed.—Ohio State Sun-Dial. AFresh Experience.—‘‘That’s a newone on me!" gurgled the Dear Thing, when the senior’s mustache made its presence felt at close range.—Dartmouth Jack o° mn, Indirect Agreement.—She—I think noth- ing is more improper than Evelyn’s bath- ing suit! He—-I should say it was!—Princeton Tiger, (WSPECTOR:) To arrive at the top in any department or commercial effort one must produce, offer and do bet- ter than has been produced, offered or done before. Fifty years ago we determined that Sunny Brook must be the finest whiskey distilled and aged in Old Kentucky and we have never deviated from this policy. ‘Today we are known as the hrgest distillers of fine old whiskies in the world. Sunny Brook reached the top because it surpassed all others in mellow flavor, exquisite bou- quet and tonic rope! of its high quality and purity are still its friends, and all over this broad land a mi ‘demands Sunny Broek and absolutely refuses substitutes y Brook is a real honest, straight Kentucky Whisk: Every bottle ts filled and then sealed with the “Green Stamp,” under the direct supervision of U. Inspectors. If you want to knew you are getting the best always ask for Sunny Brook The Pure Food Whiskey. READ THE LABEL, ies. The friends Sunny Brook made fitty years ago Try One of Our Dry Varieties Martini—Regular Martini—Dry (medium) Martini—Brut (eer dev) Manhattan—Regu! Manhattan—Dry At all dealers G.F.Heublein & Bi by the best? EARLINGTON 27th Street, West of Broadway NEW YORK EUROPEAN PLAN @ A Step from Broadway. Q Absolutely Fireproof. Quiet as a Village at Night. q Your Comfort Our Aim Always. Parlor, Bedroom and Bath, front of house, one person, $2.50; two people, $3.50. Why pay more when our service is equalled only SINGLE ROOMS, $1.00 E. W. WARFIELD, Manager In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will bo appreciated. comicbooks.com