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Judge, 1912-10-12 · page 27 of 28

Judge — October 12, 1912 — page 27: what you’re looking at

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Judge — October 12, 1912 — page 27: Judge, 1912-10-12

What you’re looking at

**"The Old Pay Envelope"** is a working-class defense of protectionist trade policy and Republican politics. The speaker—an uneducated laborer who doesn't follow economic theory—argues that his steady paycheck depends on protective tariffs, which he credits to Republican rule. He opposes free trade ("dope") and Wilson-era Democratic policies, viewing them as threats to his employment. The satire targets intellectuals who advocate free trade without understanding its impact on ordinary workers' livelihoods. **The other humor pieces** mock political campaigns (comparing them to baseball team management), a senator's wife's husband being misquoted in print, and divorce rates. The **advertisements**—Schlitz beer (brown bottles preserve quality), Pears' soap, and gemstones—are period commercial content typical of Judge magazine's revenue model. The page reflects early 1910s American anxieties about trade policy and its effects on working families.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

rame-up ete Dil. - inside, e shape ing said was ag Ml after pt get ic every man in yes out jOv'ner, o bad, to. run, ny body known, se than sted in T don’t ir poli glasses the man eet car he was e recall er, who & pare. pies!” yu think ers that rn COUR an they om my n coun re could | unless himself 00se. bed the still. it from ecall of The Old Pay Envelope. 0, I NEVER went to college, N ‘And I am not up on Greek; [ wear a pair of overalls And work hard throughout the week. I've no academic theories ‘Bout free trade and all such dope, Bat I’m greatly interested In my old pay envelope. lam not against the college— Wish I could have gone there, too, For a thorough education Helps to pull a fellow through; But when educators teach us That free trade's the nation’s hope, Gee! it makes me rather scary For my old pay envelope! Ab, that little paper package Means a heap to wife and me, Means a heap to all the children, For it’s bread and butter—see? Keeps the little roof above us, With no cares to interlope— There is joy and peace and comfort In my old pay envelope. And it has been coming steady— i eady, nice and fat; when the nation Was ruled by a Democrat. Ah, those bitter days of anguish, Out of work and out of hope! Seems life’s sunshine all departed With my old pay envelope. I've no economic theories Dancing round inside my head, $0 I'll be hanged if you catch me Voting ’gainst my daily bread. Tl not help to kill the tariff, And I want no Wilson dope, For Protection's the insurance For my old pay envelope.—rem 1. Jucten Reminds Him. Smith—This political campaign re- minds me of baseball methods.’’ Jones—‘* Baseball method Smith—‘Yes. One candidate man- ages his team from the bench, another seems to aspire to fame as a ‘pinch- ter,’ and the third wants to play all posi- tions and be umpire at the same time.'"’ Zoolugical Item. “What is the cause of the Laughing Hyena’s he’? “Oh, it tickles him to hear the Bull Moose bragging how much more honest 2 is than the Elephant and the Don- ey.” A Misplaced “ M.” Mrs. La Follette, wife of Senator Robert M. La Follette, of Wisconsin, tells of a country newspaper which, in Teporting the speech of her celebrated basband, intending to add as comment, “And the masses believed him,’? said, ent “And them asses believed im."" Going Some. Crawford—'*To what do you attribute the prevalence of divorce?” Crabshaw—‘To the fact that so many believe in a short married life and a merry one.’” from the rown Bottle and you see Pure Beer Sparkling and clear as a Crystal Spring A beer that is properly aged. A beer that will not cause biliousness. A beer that is in exactly the same condition as when it left the brewery. The Brown Bottle keeps it so. Light cannot harm Schlitz in Brown Bottles. Schlitz in Brown Bottles costs yyou no more than beer in light bottles. Order a case from your dealer today. See that crown or cork is branded ““Schlitz.?* The Beer That Made Milwaukee Famous. JUDGE ante ter ceats au Comtrctel by te Oxy-Hyaroren Furnace. Will cut class, stand acid tnd tre teu tne eal” diamonds, Hare po fil ot backing. Set only in 14x Gold Mosatings. Brilliancy saranteed 2S years. Seat ea Approval ce by reristered imal on receipe of price. Money cheerfully retunded if not satisfac~ tony Seni for vooklet. Det. B MAIDEN LANE SALES CO. 48-50 Maiden Lane, New York =a Pears The goodness in Pears’ Soap is an antidote for all bad com- plexions. For goodness sake use Pears’. Sold in America and elsewhere. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com