Judge, 1912-10-05 · page 13 of 26
Judge — October 5, 1912 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This Judge magazine page contains four unrelated humorous pieces typical of early 20th-century American satire: **"Sufficient Excuse"** mocks trivial marital disputes—a couple divorces over whether a skin irritation is a "hang-nail" or "agnail," satirizing how petty grievances destroy homes. **"In the Old Days"** is a biblical-era joke where young Ishbomush seeks permission to marry Methuselah's granddaughter, only to be told they're too young (both under 200 years old)—absurdist humor playing on pre-modern lifespans. **"Periodic Industry"** criticizes politicians as lazy workers who labor only during election campaigns ("the next campaign"), then abandon effort. **"But One Thing Inevitable"** features a Black maid asserting her existential freedom—"I ain't got to do nothin' but die"—a darkly comic assertion of human autonomy despite social constraints. The maid's dialect reflects period conventions for representing working-class Black characters. The cartoons are largely workplace/domestic humor with no apparent connection between them—typical of miscellaneous magazine filler content.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
PERILS OF THE AIR. In the Old Days. “‘Mr. Methuselah, ’’ says young Ishbo- mush, the Gileadite, ‘‘I came to ask Periodic Industry. Now politicians sweat and work, In sunshine and in rain; Sufficient Excuse. 66] ONCE had the pleasure,’’ remarked the Erratic Thinker, ‘‘of knowing aman and his wife who raved and wrangled and ripped and rumpused over whether certain small physical annoy- ances were ‘hang-nails’ or ‘agnails,’ until they finally came to blows and the divorce court. If poor, frail humanity would accept as little as being a good reason for behaving themselves as they do as sufficient provocation for misbe- having, the ordinary home, no matter whether furnished on the installment plan or not, would be more salubrious than a bungalow in Arcadia."’ tL ___ BEAUTY DRAWN BY A SINGLE THREAD, your permission to marry your grand- daughter Kezoorah.’’ “What! Little Kezoo- rah!’ exclaims Methuse- lah. “Why, what non- sense, boy! She’s only a hundred and twenty years old, and you’re barely turned a hundred and eighty. Wait about a hun- dred years, lad, and then you will learn whether this is merely calf love or the enduring affection that should warrant matri- mony.”’ A Fixed Habit. Smith —‘‘Has your son any fixed habit that worries you as to his future?’’ Jones—‘Yes. He fights about ten rounds every morning with the alarm clock.”” Egotism is an incurable disease of the I's. But soon all labor they will shirk Until the next campaign. BUT ONE THING INEVITABLE. “* Mandy, you 've simply got to be more careful." “Deed, miss, I ain't got to do nothin’ but die."” comicbooks.com