Judge — September 21, 1912 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

considered the loss of those things which delight the soul—such as cigars, for instance. I for one’’—— “A man named Smith wants you to call uptown to see about a job,’’ said the bartender, tapping the Thoughtful Man’s shoulder. “Eh? Oh, yes! Lend me a nickel for carfare, will you? Thanks!’’ And the Thoughtful Man vanished. A, Walter Usting. Popular Games. Croquet. —Next to football, croquet is probably the most dangerous game on thelist, It is played with an unlevel piece of greensward, round wooden balls wearing belts of variegated hues, and wooden sledgehammers, whose larger portions, situated on the lower end, are movable and have a way of following the ball on its course as a general thing. The first move in croquet is to place the ball which you have chosen a few inches in front of a wire called an arch or wicket, according to your birthplace. The ball is then hit forcibly with the mallet, and you at once ejaculate ‘‘Oh, fadge!"” when you discover that you have made a fuzzle and simply bent the first wicket. Your partner now does the same thing, and little by little you drive the balls about the grounds, sometimes through wickets and sometimes over them, until, in about the middle of the fame, you decide that you have played long enough and carefully place the balls and mallets in the box on the veranda, where baby soon finds them and has great glee in rolling the balls to the ground below, where they crack open in the rain during the night, thereby sav- ing you the trouble of making your life and that of your week-end guest a barden, 6. G. Garretn No Wife for Him. “What do I want with a wife?’ morted Bachelor Bockwedder, on read- ing an old maid's reasons for not want- ingabusband. ‘I have a game rooster that is vain about his fine feathers, a goat that chews the rag, an aeroplane that gets me up in the air, and an auto- mobile that keeps me all the time broke1”” Proverbial Facts. We the early bird that catches the worm, No doubt you've often heard; But don’t forget it’s the early worm That's caught by the early bird. Song Poems wit She YEDHAM MUSIC HOUSE, 111-5, St. Louis, Mo. A Bottle Evans’ Ale GOES FINE WITH Oysters, Fish, Cold Meats, Chops, Steaks, Bread and Cheese Now ts the Ume to try it, Step into nearest place or have it at home. Price An Investment That Pays Daily Dividends You can save time, printing bills, advertising expense, labor cost. An office boy can produce all your form letters, circu: lars, office forma, price liste, announcements, ete., with an UNDERWOOD suriicxroR DUPLICATOR Fifty perfect copies a minute—no better machine at any price. Silent, neat, clean, compact, ready for instant use. Useful every day—Sold without restrictions as to supply vuying. Send for Booklet ant Specimens of Work. UNDERWOOD TYPEWRITER CO., Inc. Dept. N. Underwood Bullding New York Brawches tn all Principal Cities ( VAuley GEM S The PURE FOOD Whiskey Distilled Bor Suge { PURE - MELLOW HEALTHFUL Advertising of Advertising— A Seriesof Talks—No. 36 Getting the Weight You Pay For New York State has a new law which, let us hope, will be copied all over the country. For this law re- quires the net weight of every com- modity sola in packages, whether advertised or unadvertised, to be plainly marked on the label, so that you and I can know the weight we are paying for. This means that if the package contains 1, 2, 3, 4 or 5 pounds, pre- sumably, it can not be marked “1,” ,”” **4"" or “5 as the case be nay be. “without the word “ Ane “pounds” or an abbreviatio: ‘tt a figure goes on the ae it must represent the appropriate standard of weight, whether pounds, quarts or bushels. Otherwise, the package cannot be sold lawfully. Under this new law think what the package will mean to you over and above its readier_ identification of a product, its sanitary value, its convenience _in_handling, and the uniformity in size and weight for the same product. You will realize the advantage fully, if yes are at all familiar with the work of alert public officials like those in the Bureau of Weights and Measures of New York City. The surest way to get the weight you pay for is to buy well advertised and plainly, honestly marked pack- age goods. You can generally be sure, too, that the dealer who pushes such goods, instead of offering you some- thing “‘just as good’’ is serving your interests—giving you both the qual- ity and the weight you pay for. As to other dealers—a word to the wise is efficient. Gita. NG fun. pbbacrty Con In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com