Judge, 1912-08-31 · page 23 of 24
Judge — August 31, 1912 — page 23: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains primarily **short humorous anecdotes** on the left side and **advertisements** on the right. The anecdotes are simple, pun-based jokes about everyday situations: a student's malapropism about velocity, a woman who won't sing unless breaking into melody, a woman engaged but unsure of her fiancé's first name, and various other domestic quips. These reflect early 1900s middle-class concerns: education, courtship, marriage, and domestic life. The large **eagle illustration** accompanies a **Budweiser beer advertisement** claiming it's "The World's Favorite Bottled Beer" with sales figures (173+ million bottles in 1911). This represents period advertising hyperbole. Below are ads for **Pears' Soap** (claiming it cures "bad complexions") and **Varicose Veins treatment**—typical patent-medicine-era advertising making dubious health claims. The page is primarily **advertising and filler humor**, not political satire. The jokes represent gentle, mainstream American humor of the era rather than sharp social criticism.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
miles Howells, at : Said of g | Poetry is as walki wild Net lower, Mr, oftly, jout friend et tired?” one, drav- 0 Brother house fer n't got ne ly six feet Smith, I's tin’ up al ‘ompanion, troit they though be y, was ab 3 extran wever, be n of great gS took bride ver > the fact difference love,” wis it alarmed. d. i the bee know that ded for.” added the eply, “TH Passing the Mustard Velocity. —Teacher—‘‘ What is veloc- ity, Johnny ?”’ ~ oy ‘Johnny—‘‘Velocity is what a fellow Jets go of a wasp with. ’’— Pathfinder. A Hint.—Miss Vocolo—‘'I’m never bappy unless I'm breaking into song.”’ Bright young man—‘‘Why don’t you t the key and you won't have to break int?”—New Orleans Times-Democrat. All Mabel Knows.—‘‘Mabel is en- “Whom to?’’ “She doesn’t say in her letter. All that she knows so far is that his first name is Frank.’’—Detroit Free Press. Might Have Been a Hint.—Amateur palmist—‘‘T think you are going to be married twice.’” Young lady—‘‘You think! Well, I'd rather you were sure I was guing to be married once.’’—Boston Transcript. Sinister Purpose.—‘‘Why did you in- sist on having your wife join the Suffra- gette Club? “Because,” replied Mr. Meekton grimly, ‘‘I want to see that Suffragette Clb get all the trouble that’s coming to it.’"—-Washington Star. A Sure Sign.—‘‘So he took you out riding the other evening?”" “I think so. I know that every time I spoke to him, the auto tried to climb a tree or jump a fence."’—Houston Post. Subtraction. -- Aunt Dorothy—‘**How many commandments are there, Johnny ?"” Johnny (glibly)—‘*Ten."” Aunt Dorothy—‘* And now suppose you were to break one of them?’’ Johnny (tentatively)—‘**Then there'd be nine.""—-Christian Register. The Trouble.—‘* Why were you absent from school yesterday, Grace?’’ asked the teacher, * “Please, teacher, muvver was sick.’ The teacher, who is afraid of conta- gion, asked, “What is the matter with her?) What does the doctor say it is? “Please, teacher, he says it’s a boy.’’ —Harper's Magazine. Three of a Kind.—‘‘So they are mar- ried?”" . ‘Yes; they were married last Friday in East Liverpool.” “He is a champion golfist, I under- Stand,’" “Yes, he’s a champion golfist.’" “And the girl?’’ Is a champion bridge player." “Where do they propose to live?”” With the bride’s father. He’s a champion bricklayer."’—Pittsburgh Post. Budweiser The World’s Favorite Bottled Beer What made it so?— QUALITY and PURITY 173,184,600 Bottles sold in 1911. Bottled only at the Home Plant in St. Louis Anheuser-Busch Brewery St. Louis, Mo. Advertising of Advertising See Talk No. 33 on page 2 of this issue. Pears’ HENRY LINDENM ; The goodness in Pears’ Soap | p Ap ER WER aiO tise isan antidote for all bad com- | 4.1, joui.2 sp438 Bleecker Street plexions. ALL KINDS OP PAPER MADE TO ORDER .| VARICOSE VEI NS, "Apizss. mr. ‘Springfield, Mass, Are promptly relieved with inexpens Ttabsolutely removes the pail disease. Pull particulars op receipt of W. F. Young, P. D. F., 115 Temple St For goodness sake use Pears. Sold in America and elsewhere. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com