Judge, 1911-06-10 · page 17 of 24
Judge — June 10, 1911 — page 17: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple satirical pieces typical of Judge's style: **"The Line of Least Resistance"** (top cartoon): Four figures peer over a fence, likely representing public figures responding to contemporary claims. The satire undercuts famous statements—Edison's cheap airship (implying hidden costs), Morgan's money coming to America (mocking reciprocal economic hypocrisy), and claims about plants being animals and Shakespeare's vocabulary (absurd declarations). **"The Summer Landlady"**: A humorous poem mocking landlords who charge premium rates despite serving poor meals or small portions. **"The Skirts of Janice"**: A nostalgic poem lamenting women's increasingly short skirts (likely 1910s fashion), with the speaker comically getting stepped on by the wider, noisier hems—satirizing changing women's fashion. **Minor pieces**: "The Wolf and the Lamb" (a fable adaptation) and "No Use Going Any More" (mocking a woman's repeated Atlantic crossings and customs inspectors). The page emphasizes Judge's formula: punching up at powerful figures, commenting on social/fashion trends, and pairing verse with quick satirical commentary.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Summer Landlady. HE EITHER fries much, her steak too Or her desserts are small, Who dares not charge ten plunks a we For bedrooms off the hall! END. “THE LINE OF LEAST RESISTANCE.” “They Say”"—and We Comment, “AN AIRSHIP can be built for fif- teen dollars.’’—Thomas A. Edi- son, (It’s the funeral that costs.) “A balloon race is really a rather colorless affair.’’—Glenn Curtiss. (Yet there would seem to be plenty of atmos- phere.) “T still insist that plants, accurately considered, are animals.’’—Professor Darwin. (Which is pretty hard on the vegetarians. ) “A poet laureate in the United States ""—Le Gallienne. to-day who would be impossible. (There’s one in England seems nearly that.) “Much idle French money is coming to America.'’—J. P. Morgan. (Merely reciprocity; think of the idle American money that’s gone to France.) “I've written my last nov I'm going to make money raising chick- ens.’""—Booth Tarkington. (Leaving him, however, still in the field of fic- tion.) “TI believe that money will soon be a drug in the market.”"—S. B. Guggen- cheim. (We predict it will be easy to find folk ready to acquire the habit.) “T have estimated that Shakespeare and I make use of almost exactly the Now same number of words.’’—Gabriel d’An- nunzio. (Then it must be that they are arranged differ- ently.) “My duties as a member of Parliament make it in- creasingly difficult for me to keep up my novel writing.’ A. E. W. Mason. (In view of this, we stand ready to nominate several American literary lights who may be urged to stand for The Skirts of Janice. By RICHARD WIGHTMAN HE SKIRTS of Janice used to hang above her dimpled knee— I guess that I was five or six and Janice only three. And then they came below her knee, then to her shoes, and down Till but her dainty toetips lured the glances of the town. Still, in those dear and blithesome days, the skirts of Janice kept Their silence and their proper place and ne’er the pavement swept; But now the noisy skirts of her swish wide and far behind, And when I blankly tread on them her speech is most unkind. Oh, Janice, Janice! Get the shears and shorten them to where They were when we went berrying in Connor’s meadow. There! Don’t scold me, Janice! Really, dear, I love you now as then, But women’s skirts should never tempt the clumsy feet of men. No Use Going Any More. “ RS. FINDLAY says she has crossed the Atlantic fifty times.’’ “Yes; but the customs inspectors have become so inquisitive that I heard her say the other day that she had about decided to see America now."’ M* HEART'S in their keeping, My heart's not here, My heart's with the ladies, For springtime is here. NOT A WATERY The kangaroo—'' Gee! 1'd come in if I wasn't afraid of drowning.’ I Congress. ) Alligator—'" That's all right. I'li promise you that you won't drown.”’ Warwick Jame Price THE WOLP AND THE LAMB. comicbooks.com