Judge — February 18, 1911 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUST FOR THAT SHE TATTOOED HIM Mrs, Pyro—* Club again, eh ? from his own fireside."” Mr. Pyro (not a near-art enthusiast)—" No. dreads the fire."” You ‘re not like the man who never cared to wander I'm more like the burnt child who Wit and Wisdom of Bildad. HE MAN who has to fish for compliments. is usually short of bait. Departing fortune seldom provides herself with a return ticket. The man who s will always find his rain checks es up for a rainy day negotiable. pme men seem to think that they have to lead a fast life to keep ahead of their creditors louder words, they are mething, of public Actions sp actions for breach of promise or s available for the purpose If we all looked before we leaped, is highly probable that there would not in the world. n whose hands are be s> many lepers If the average mz idle would devote all their powers and strength to holding his tongue, there would not be so much gossip in the air. The man who tries to show off in his aeroplane is in all probability suffering that kind of pride that the philoso- phers tell us goeth before a fall. It is only after the fool and his money are parted that there is much hope for the reformation of the fool. The trouble with a great ms in at the bottom of th they spend most of their time looking around for an elevator to take from men adder them up. To a man who is in a great hurry to get somewhere, a stitch in time is worth a good deal more than two in the side. The so-called Adam’s apple in a man’s neck is accounted for by anatomists on the general presumption that that is where Adam got what was coming to him. When you are too angry for words, it is just as well not to use any, remember- ing that a word in the vocabulary is worth two on the tongue. The man who in the graceful terminol- ogy of the vernacular ‘‘shoots off his mouth"’ will be found, in nine cases out of ten, to be an indifferent shot. It may be true that a watched pot never boils, but a jackpot, no matter how hard you watch it, will evaporate even under the most chilling condi- tions. A dyspeptic philosopher says that many a man can’t make up his mind whether to be a rich sinner or a poor Christian. We may add that he usually compromises on being both. It is asad fact that a great many men are so careless of their health that they neglect their liver until it is too late to save even their bacon. Accidents will happen unles: pen to have an accident police: they show a decided tendency to sheer off. you hap- when The Old Familiar Steed. L‘s* night, while I lay dreaming, Ihad a frightful scare. I saw two wild eyes gleaming, For I rode the old nightmare. In Concealment. HAT there is a poet concealed some- where in the House of Representa- tives at Washington is proven beyond peradventure by the fact that the follow- ing lines were picked up on the floor after a recent session of that august body Now, where the Cannon used to roar, With tears the place is damp, And sounding o’er The crowded floor, The Clarks do neigh and champ. “Something Just as Good.”’ Village druggist—‘*Lucas, how do we n pills?”” tant—*We hain’t got none for stand Ass spring epizootic."” Village druggist—‘Take some o* them white ones an’ dye ‘em green.” CANNED Stub-tailed one—"* Oh, yes. Now I remember, you ‘re the dog that was making fun of my tail the other dav."” comicbooks.com