Judge — February 4, 1911 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PREADING. — London Punch. When Animals Dress. When the animals shall all wear clothes, "Twill be worth half a dollar, | Whe the giraffe is all dressed up, To see his standing collar. —Christian Science Monthly. | A health to all the animals! | We'd gladly drink a bumper If we could see the kangaroo Dressed in a woolen jumper. —Youngstown Telegram. We'd like to see the porcupine, | When he gets in a passion, pin back in the fa Just elevate hi ion. nkers And when the hare in running fast | 3 in action, | y he stops at last, ring a smile of satis Statesman. | tion. Easy Change WHEN COFFE IS DOING HARM. A lady writes from the land of cotton of the results of a four years’ use of the food beverage—-hot Postum. “Ever since I can remember we had used coffee three times aday, Ithada | more or less injurious effect upon us all, | yself suffered almost death from indigestion and nervousness caused by it. ‘I know it was that, because when | would leave it off for a few days I would feel better. But it was hard to give it up, even though I realized how harmful it was to me. t last I found a perfectly easy way » the change. Four years ago I abandoned the coffee habit and began to drink Postum, and so influenced the rest of the family todo the same. Even the children are allowed to drink it | do er. And it has 10 longer suffer from indigestion, and my nerves are in admirable tone since I began to use Postum, We never use the old coffee any m “We appreciate Postum as a delight- ful and healthful beve » which not only invigorates, but supplies the best of nourishment as well.’? Name given by Postum Co., Battle Creek, Mich. Read ‘‘The Road to Wellville,’” packages, ‘‘There’s a Reason.” Ever read the above letter? A mew one appears trom time to Ume. They are genuine, true, and full of human interest. in Hard to Raise. “They say,’’ remarked the student, ‘that truth lies at the bottom of awell."’ “IT guess that’s right,’’ rejoined the old lawyer, ‘judging by the amount of pumping we have to do in order to get a little of it."’—Chicago News. Mothers will find Mrs, Winslow's Soothing Syrup the best remedy for their children, 25c. a bottle. In the Rush. Most men are so anxious to make a name, it makes no difference to them whether it’s a good one or a bad one.- New York Press, Signs of Honest Toil. After the plumber had finished some repairs about his office, the kind- hearted business man said to him, “You will find soap and clean towels in the washroom and you are welcome to use them when you get through.’’ The plumber spruced up after he had finished his work, but, to the astonish- ment of the business man, he appeared a few minutes later with his face daubed with dirt and grease. “Why in the world did you blacken your face up again after you had wsshed yourself?"’ the business man aske: Grinning guiltily, the plumber re- plied, ‘If I went back to the office with a clean face, the boss would think I had been loafing on the job."’— Youngstown ‘elegram. Random Remarks. It is hard to convince a successful man that luc an accident. You can drive the stocks to water, but you can’t make them shrink. The promoter thinks he is working wonders when he is really working suckers. When a man’s wife m s his ne ties, you can’t blame him for wearing long whiskers. The fact that absence makes the heart grow fonder shouldn't influence us against presence of mind. You don’t have to be a dressmaker to realize that a divorce suit usually costs more than a wedding gown.—Philadel- phia Record. Quite True. The man about to pay his fare on a pay-as-you-enter car dropped a dollar, which fell to the platform and rolled off across the pavement into an opening, where it disappears The loser watched its cours “It wouldn’t have gone half as far if I'd spent it,” he said.— Buffalo Express. Somewhat Cynical. Do you believe there such a thing as honor among thieve Cynicus—*Certainly not. They are just as bad as other people.”"—Chicago News. Danvers— Great Progress. “Developed your gold mine as yet?”” “Sure! I started with desk room, and now I have a suite."’—Pittsburgh Post. JUDGE’S FAVORITE. EMMY WEHLEN IN “MARRIAGE A LA CARTE," AT THE CASINO. Oh, Emmy, beauteous Viennese, From you we cannot bear to part. Fair charmer of our hours of ease, We beg you on our bended knees, To stay with us forever, please, And play in ‘ Marriage a la Carte."” A Novelty. “I see your son has gone to work.’” “Yep.” “How is he getting along?’ “Oh, fine! Anything in the w novelty always appeals to him. ington Herald. Expensive Identification. “Tam to meet the duke at the dock.”” “But he has never seen you, girl!”” ‘For means of identification he is to wear a red carnation and I am to carry one million dollars in my left hand.’’ Washington Herald. Pears No impurity in Pears’ Soap. Economical to use. It wears out only for your comfort and cleanliness. : Sold in every land. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com