Judge, 1910-12-31 · page 20 of 27
Judge — December 31, 1910 — page 20: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical pieces typical of early 20th-century American humor: **"The Boss"** mocks working-class domestic life through a burglar who encounters a husband whose wife controls the finances—a joke about female economic power in marriage. **"Helping Sister Out"** uses a child's innocent prayer mistake to satirize sibling rudeness; the brother's crude answer about funerals is darkly humorous. **"Oreste Knew"** ridicules the modern obsession with "wireless" and "horseless" innovations by having a Chicago woman's son (named Oreste, suggesting European pretension) quip about "loveless marriages"—satirizing both technological fads and wealthy Americans marrying foreign nobility. **"Don Quixote Up-to-Date"** parodies the classic novel by replacing Spanish windmills with a modern attack on a "King of Jersey" stronghold, likely referencing New Jersey industrial monopolies or trusts. The outdated heroic language applied to modern corporate warfare creates the satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE “ BOss."" 1. Burglar—" Hey, pard, yer money or yer life !"" Pre Wee—" My wife got the cash. She will be here in a minute."’ ‘e¥ 78, t y t | | 2 2. Mrs. Pee Wee—"' What's this?) An- other book-agent ?"" Helping Sister Out. T WAS bedtime. The small sister, whose memory was poor, was strug- gling through her prayers. She prayed: “Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to ki If I should die before I wake At this point she stopped. ‘What comes next, brother?"’ she de- manded. “A funeral, you fool!'’ was the dis- gusted answer. Oreste Knew. 6 E HAVE fireless cookers, wire- less telegraphy, horseless car- riages, smokeless powder"— The teacher paused an instant. ‘Now, can you name some of the other things?” The {ittle son of the Chicago woman who had married a count raised his hand. “I know!” he shouted. “Well, Oreste, you may tell us."" “Loveless marriages!"’ cried the youngster proudly. DON QUIXOTE UP-TO-DATE. INSTEAD OF THREE BALLS. Johnnie Fly—"' What are you doing with that clover leaf ?"” . Willie Bug—' 1'm goin’ ter start a pawn- broker’s shop, and this makes a fine sign.” Money makes the beggar go. 1. “*At last, friend Sancho, we have reached the portals of the palace of ‘the great King of Jersey, guarded by Sir Steeltrust and the Iron Knight, whom I shall put on the blink ! 2.—— Stand aside, varlets, that I may enter this stronghold, and, single handed and alone, give battle to the mighty lords within ! 3. —— They were tough customers, bat they have succumbed to my supe: Follow me into the castle and thou shalt witness deeds that shall reek to the high beavens ! —— 4. ——Slash! Swish! Kerplunk! Zip! Socko! Die, caitiffs! Not a mother's son of you shall live to tell the tale of this terrible slaughter ! — 5. —— At last, Squire Sancho, we have come into something soft! I have vanquished the lords of this castle in fair combat and now the whole joint is our lawful spoil ! — comicbooks.com