Judge — October 29, 1910 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

It is not necessary to make extravagant claims for the quality of FORD Bourbon Made in an_ old-fashioned distillery in an old-fashioned way, it has an Old-fashioned quality which appeals to men who appreciate old- fashioned merit. Bottled in bond under governmental supervision. The Clear Spring Distilling Co. Bardstown, Ky. Chicago Office of Distribution 216-218 Randolph Street IMPERIAL. Not only the best AMFRICAN Cnampagne but the very best CHAMPAGNE money can buy KENTUCKY DISTILLERS Wik “* Here!s Role, w]Ope ! ber es SmQge, nd Say," Fdge!” OF you'ee au u Grandpa Meekins’s Ungrateful Hen. (Concluded from preceding pave.) the hen and put the entire family back in the barrel. To his surprise, this method did not meet the approval of the neurotic mother. No sooner had he picked up the first chicken than she flew in his face, entangling her scaly feet in his patriarchal beard, at the same changing her vicious war cry to a clam- orous cry for mercy. The neighbors (by this time all watch- ing from their windows) say that at this point Grandpa Meekins seemed to lose his temper and talked to that hen as they never in their lives heard him speak before. He kept backing about in a circle, to escape, until he encoun- | tered the barrel and fell backward over it, and in a moment all they could s was a pair of bed socks wildly signaling distress. Nor was this the worst of his misfor- tune. With thoughtful care for the ex- pected chickens, he had mixed a pan of soft cornmeal dough and placed it behind the barrel, so if they should arrive in the night they would not have to wait for his awakening to get ‘their breakfast. His head struck one side of this pan, inverting it with such precision that it stood bottom up over his face. When Mr. Meekins relates the incident to a friend, he always concludes with: “It was all very annoying, but what hurt me worst of all was what my wife said when she was cleaning off that dough: ‘Philander, what on earth pos: sessed you to go out in your night clothes, in plain sight of all the neighbors, and play |with that old bar- rel?""" A man will quit his bad habits when he ‘dies.—N. Y. Press. FERD. MULHENS COLOGNE YRH. GERMANY Unlike Any Other One secret of Monarch superiority lies in the wonderful responsiveness of its key action In no other typewriter in the world do the keys so readily yield to tne slightest touch of the finger “That is why the Monarch is easier to operate than any other writing machine MONARCH Light Touch That is why it wards off fatigue and saves nerve strain on the part of the stenog rapher In consequence, her work is cleaner-cut, more accurate, more rapid and greater in quantity than it is possible to obtain with any other writing machine For these reasons you need a Monarch in your office And every day without it means actual money-loss to you besides Send for Monarch Literature many reasons fot Monarch superiority. Then try the Monarch, and be convinced ‘b merit rests in the machine itvelt, not metely in what we tell you about "4 wanted everywhere, also a few more dealers fot large tertitor Write tor details and attractive terms The Monarch Typewriter Company Branches and dealers throughout the world A Financial Deadlock. “Who is that man who has been sit- Of scanty talents we are led, ting behind the bar day after day?” in- _ Somehow, to be the proudes! quired the stranger in Crimson Gulch. | The man who sings the worst, “That's Stagecoach Charley. He's in| Will often sing the loudes a peculiar predicament. He went to Rochester Post town last week and got his teeth fixed. . Then he come here and, bein’ broke, ran Breaking It Gently. up a bill on the stren’th of his seven! ‘You broke your engagement with dollars’ worth of gold fillin’. Charley | Miss Jaullier?”” won't submit to havin’ the nuggets pried ; but I broke it gently.” out an’ the proprietor won't let him git ‘*How?"” away with the collateral, and there you! ‘‘Told her what my salary was.” are!"' Washington Star, Cleveland Leader. Srprese Delicately Scented White ‘Rose ™ Glycerine Soap Soothing - Beneficial Competition has not touched it That Means Merit MULHENS & KROPFF NEW YORK © I5¢ IN STAMPS FOR FULL SIZE SAMPLE CAKE In answering advertisements.please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. — Cie cic. Qs’ ep =»