Judge, 1910-07-02 · page 6 of 16
Judge — July 2, 1910 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This 1910s-era piece satirizes safety campaigns against dangerous Fourth of July fireworks by proposing absurdly violent "alternatives." The humor works through dark irony: rather than safe substitutes, author Horace Dodd Gassit suggests explosions involving household servants and family members—firing "the hired man," having "the cook" explode, and rolling barrels down staircases. The accompanying cartoons show an older figure (likely representing authority/tradition) observing revelry, and a domestic scene with advice about fishing. The satire mocks both the earnestness of reformers promoting "sane" celebrations and class attitudes toward working-class employees as disposable objects of comedy. The piece reflects early 20th-century attitudes toward workplace safety and working-class labor as acceptable subjects for cruel humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Yo For a Safe and Sane Fourth. by HORACE DODD GasTiT N= THAT firecrackers are placed under the ban by the laws of some communities, the boys and girls will find numerous other explosive noises within their reach that are entirely safe and in many cases wholly sane. Among these substi- tutes we find the following: 1, Shelling peas will be found to make a pleasant little noise not unlike the pop of a small firecracker, and will prove very help- ful to the cook. 2. In place of the very dangerous bombs formerly in vogue for celebrations of the day, get your father to blow up the hired man. If he does it well, the hired man will either go off with a loud noise or will go up in the air with much sputtering. 3. A similarly entertaining and wholly harmless diversion as a AN OLD woopcuT. substitute for firing a cannon is to discharge the cook. She is likely to explode with a pyrotechnicel display that will be found most edi- fying. 4. An interesting noise similar to the reverberant discharge of the exceedingly mischievous giant cracker is to fill a grocer’s paper bag with hot air and give it a terrific whack on the side. This done at sunrise from the outside of your parent’s door will start the day along resonantly with no attendant injuries. 5. Atound like the crash of artillery can be derived from an old barrel filled with tin cans, broken crockery, and two or three dozen empty bottles, mixed in with a couple of old cannon balls, set rolling down the front staircase. 6. An electric-light bulb tapped sharply with the end of a ADVICE. “* Say, pop, the boarder wants me to go fishing with him." “* All right, son; but don’t take him where any fish is."