Judge — December 18, 1909 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

CLUB TALK. to clubs? try club, proposed to her ata dues.” Bronx—' Harlem club, now the alimony he pays her just me Why has Jones become so op; + her club JOSH JENKS'S MARVELOUS CAN OPENER. ft tin’ some- HERE was a sym- | cu ts posiumoft cts of Gunville in thin’, he were, except the way to make Dave Hoyle’s saloon~ | money, which was bad for Josh, not to though Gunvillites| mention trade, I took a frien'ly inter- would have called it|est in Josh, him bein’ by way of a dis- “a meetin’ of the) tant relation of mine, and ofttimes of boys.”” Jan arternoon Josh would look in an’ sit Dave, having chosen| on t t stool an’ talk, not that talk a fat cigar, being of a y to get at, always ‘bout trian- sethodical mind, rung up five cents on | gl 1 ever sot eyes upon, n’ no few. Alw an’ dinnymics, which I take was the cash register and seated himsi ‘If to do with * ricity. sith his heels on the stove. He blew a| “Things was goin’ bad with Josh, an’ reflective cloud of smoke, which, inci-| | was sayin’ to myself that his invent- fentally, all landed in Hiram James's jn’ fever was ‘bout over, when he comes lefteye, When the laughter occasioned jn one day wavin’ a great can an’ plants among the company by Hiram's back jt on the counter. I ducks under, think- lomersault had died away, Dave, being jn’ it was a bomb the fool feller had, king in his own bar, began, but when I sees nothin’ doin’ I pops up, “Talkin’ "bout cranks and bugs, I lettin’ on I had been lookin’ for cork. éon't know if any of youse boys knew «'Lo, Josh,’ says I. ‘Dave,’ says he, Josh Jenks what used to ve got ’em hip an’ thigh now. Be- years. I guess ye don't. hold Josh Jenks’s patent self-openin’ ish was the most all-fired mechan'cal ‘Trade-mark, “Opens at the word en lack some can. 0” commanc “It "pears he had been r kind of a kid’s book—'I or suthin "bout a f what found a robbers’ sold dust an’ an’ If You Want Hair | When Old © chockful of joolry le the rocks Candies The Masterpiece of the ON Confectioner’s Art THE CHARACTER OF CANDY DEPENDS ITS FITNESS FOR Gift Making Sales Agencies and Stores everywhere golf club, married her at a church n’ firms, an’ one on 'em was fool nough to take it on trial, the under- standin’ bein’ that Josh was to git ten thousan’ if it wi any good, There no holdin’ in Josh, an’ he spends all he has treatin’ the boys an’ talkin’ "bout at he was goin’ to do with t ash. pon Josh’s cans were on th an’ spite of one Dutchie who came seekin’ Josh’s blood, because he near starved to death on a Sunday owin’ to * unable to say ‘Open Seize Him,’ all went with bells. “Then the barrel bust. Some blamed burglar got into Deacon Walker's store, where he had laid in "bout a hundred mar- dollars’ wuth of canned stuff with Josh's ays the pass word of ‘Open Si » sich truck. | Well, Josh's i kin’ of al talkin? machine to the preserve cans, to | ards, ye see, so that when ye | Him’ into a hol sits to workin’ and off He gits me to open when he up an Jim,” or sor 2 ir was to fix pops the lid on its own, the pass word, an’, I'll be hange if the ornery ol’ thing don’t give acl; click an’ act ’cordin’ to the word, it was, an’ [lent Josh ten beans to gi it patented, there bein’ a little idear of me gittin’ half profits. “Then Josh takes it roun’ all the can-| PACKER’S TAR SOAP The cleansing, antiseptic and tonic properties its pure pine-tar, glycerine and sweet vege- lable oils have given it an exclusive character, wth unvarying results, for over 35 years. THE PACKER MFG. CO., New York | | patent, an’ like a doggoned edyut he ds the label, an’ to test it, says ize Him,’ an’ blame if all them n’ begin to go off like erack- ers. The neighbors, hearin’ the noise gits scared, thinks some varmint is git- ly to blast Gunville off the map, Is into deacon’s store. The bur- yell an’ grits away by a back he neighbors do "bout two hundred an’ fifty dollars’ damage chasin’ thro’ the store. “Deacon he comes down on the can company, an’ they comes down on Josh, T lent Josh a dollar, an’ there must be a power of interest due, for to this here day I ain't sot eyes on Josh. That were the last I heard on him, though I guess he’s flyin’ airships now under a nomdy- plum.” “What kin’ of a fixin’ had Joshon the can?" said the school-teacher. “Aw, go on!” said Dave. o’ them mechan'cal cusses. time, boys.’* Another Closin® THE I A black serena Beat a drum a: Oh, my dusky An’ Mi sho'ly knows Here he paused, but the drum T DRUM. ed Grubb, led ‘* You're my [ub, ay 6% added—" dub 1" iB) comicbooks.com