Judge, 1909-08-28 · page 12 of 16
Judge — August 28, 1909 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertisements and contest results**, not political satire. The main content announces winners of Judge's "Bird Puzzle Contest" from July 10, 1909—readers had to identify six bird illustrations, one of which was cunningly labeled "Philip Morris Cigarettes" (a visual pun, since Philip Morris is a cigarette brand, not an actual bird). The scattered humor pieces are light social comedy: an anecdote about a baseball umpire bringing two friends to a game; a child's innocent but rude question to an elderly aunt; a schoolboy's joke about the Mississippi River being "Mister Sippi." These are gentle domestic humor typical of Judge's content. The advertisements for liqueurs, Philip Morris Cigarettes, Barker Brand collars, and John Jameson Whiskey dominate the layout. There is **no political satire or caricature** on this page—it's a standard issue mixing advertising revenue with light entertainment and contest results.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
29000000 00-0 000000000: Liqueur Peres Chartreux FOR 300 YEARS THE WORLD'S MOST FAMOUS CORDIAL AWARDS Bird Puzzle Contest (See Issue of Judge for July 10th, 1909) 1. Blackbird 4. Sparrow 2. Chippey 5. Blue Jay 3. Robin 6. Philip Morris Cigarettes award of the prizes—made in accordance with the conditions printed in : for July 10th, 1909—is as follows: FIRST PRIZE $10.00 Divided between W. J. Hagerty, Honesdale, Pa L. L. Beegle, Brooklyn, N.Y. Daniel N. Rubin, Charleston, S. C. E. T. Wood, Mount Vernon, Ill. Florence W. Sturtevant, Andover, Mass, Ellaeworth B. Cregier, 736 Fullerton Boulevard, Chicago, Ill., and George S Wythe, 66% George St . Baltimor Md. Ada T, Drake, Fredonia, Robert McCabe, New York Frank L. Olcott, Hartford, Conn, Katie B. Coy w York City. .¥. Ye SECOND PRIZE A year’s subscription to JUDGE'S LIBRARY h of the following: THIRD PRIZE Awarded to A year's subscription to SIS KIN’S OWN BOOK Awarded to each of the following: W. A. Poyck, Wilkes-Barri Alice Miller Weeks, Chicag. 1, J. Williams, Newport, R. I. Nicholas Olson, Galesburg, Il. er, Atlanta, . W. J. Harper, North Vernon, Towa City, Nonnenmacher, Patchogue, N.Y Milwaukee, Wis. Carroll, Middletown, Lillian Stewart Mra, John W. . B. Smith, Wewoka, Okla, man, Springfield, Ill, nyd, Williamsport, Pi in ere nt Byrne, Cambridge, N. Y. } John M. Je., Naugatuck, nrader, lowa City, Ia. jogart, Hannibal, Mo. uyden, Hartford, Conn. Katherine B. Lemen, Cairo, Ill. Arvid Lindberg, Brigham, Utah. M. W. Lenfestey, Aztec, N. M. George Edgar Frye, New Glasgow, Canada, . M. Shawhan, Seattle, Wash. Mra. Homer Miller, Plainvie A. W. Kramer, Louisville, Ky. W. Herbert Drenning, Baltimore, Md. Raymond Russell, leport, O. Zola Kirby, C d, Tenn. Conn. Glenn Lowry, Braddock, Pa. J.C. Be E.R. » Neb. PHILIP MORRIS ORIGINAL LONDON CIGARETTES MISNAMED. During a geography lesson in a Balti- more school one day the teacher spoke at great length touching that wonderful stream, the Mississippi. Incidentally she afforded the pupils some interesting liked by Best account of the historic events associate every man who with the great river. y inowereks she must not overlook the poetic value of the name Mississippi. It means smoke r “Father of Wate boys and girls. lad, however, was not much im- tribution to his I beg pardon, put if the name of Don't forget that, IMBASSADOR after dim 3Sc, | why don’t they |—Cirele, it ‘Mister Sippi’?”” A dull blade makes the ugliest cut, and a slow life the sickliest fun.—Fx. In answering advertisemen the river means ‘Father of Waters,’| uae |Reflected Humor A REMARKABLE UMPIRE. At a baseball game i gatekeeper hurried to C of the White Sox, and said, mpire Hurst is here friends. TI pass ’em in? An umpire with two friends!"? asped Comiskey. — ‘*Sure!""—Every- body's. | WORSE AND WORSE. e, dear, you're an ‘ “but it isn’t nice to ask such questions.’ Katie—""Now, don’t be mad, auntie. I know it isn't your fault.""—Chicago Kecord-Herald. TRIVIALITIES. The individual who writes cheap house- | keeping statistics never has to pay the grocery bills. Handsome women evidently do not pose for the beach-bathing newspaper pictures, It is better to erect imagination sky- scrapers than to have no ambi i Every woman thinks her husband is the smartest, but she seldom tells him of the fact when alone. Abnormal self-esteem and diffidence are never found in the same subject. In spite of the warnings of medical experts, it is evident that kissing often breeds things more dangerous than mi- crobes, One has to be slightly daffy to d play the real characteristics of genius, —Seranton Tribune, Every lover of @ gout cocktail should insist that | Abbott's Hitters be used in it; insures your wetting the very best. GROWING SOME. At this season of the year one hears of the big melons, big squashes, ete., ete. Local country fairs generally decide the question for indi- vidual communities, The palm for all such stories, however, belongs to a rner who writes a New York friend about the Alaska-Yukon-Pacific follows ture is the crop and produce exhibit. Strawberr large as oranges may seem remarkat some, and cherries that to the uninit ated are apples, but it's the spuds we! are proud of. Potatoes, 1 suppose you know, grow in the Yakima valley. A rancher there had an experience with a Hi jpetato that is worth while telling. | wife wanted another potato to replenish her supply, and asked her hubby to gather one. He was an obliging chap. and started for the field with a crowbar. The field was on a hillside, the house in the valley below. After a great deal of work he got the potato loose single handed, and made ready to haul it home. | By some means never explained, the | potato broke loose from its moorings and started on a journey of carnage down the hill, crushing several -n to smithereens, and ended up by hitting the house amidships, totally demolishing i Naturally much comment was raised by the tragedy, and some talk of provoking governmental regulation of crops for public y whiflle lew over and nothing was done until a wal elon sprung aleak and drowned Chicago the miskey, leader with two Cocktails | A Bottled Delight When youmixacocktail, you take chances. When you use CLUB Cock. TAILS you don’t even have to mix. Just pour over cracked ice and you'll have the most deli <q cious and satisfy. ing drink you ever tasted. ‘They can't help being better than the mixed at random kind. Martini (gin base) Man- hattan(whis- hey base) are always popular, C.F. HEUBLEIN Hartford New York Collars ane Cuffs GS: BARKER BRANDS “A 20 OF unen sats 156 FORQ5¢° Sty NOT AT HOME. ‘a “Yo see "er, Seventy-seven. Seventy-seven | Tell ’er I’m hout!” wife is here asking 10 desperation\—"' Phew! seventeen persons. Of course this tim the government really had to do som | thing; a limit was placed on the size of |crops, so that at the exposition now there aren’t any potatoes over ten feet | in diameter, but we have pictures of| them as they used to be. It seems a shame the government had to butt in, but possibly it is for the best.”” An innocent girl is too innocent to JONIN JAMESON x *k * WHISKEY For Sale Everywhere Ww. A. TAYLOR & CO., Sole Agcats, New Yor iknow it.—N. Y. Press, COMME DOO KS Co