Judge — July 31, 1909 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHERE THERE IS ECONOMY. | fiery N A discus- ea | ) sion about a “Gel commercial ized minis- | try, perhaps the follow- ing story, taken from the New York Sun, has some point: The! anager of an employment agency noted hat a woman in search of a maid asked nch of the girls if she had ever been imployed ina minister's family. None ff them had b “May L ask," said the manager, ‘why | joa are particularly anxious to know if hese girls have had an engagement of at kind?"” | “Because we are very hard up just ." the woman replied candidly, and I must have a girl who is econom- jal. I have found that of all the serv- ts, those who have worked in clergy- en's families know best how to econ- nize.’” SAME OLD SERMON. The Rev. Simon Turpie was an elo-| fuent speaker. A young man in the/| gregation was about to leave for| cath Africa, but the Sunday before he parted he attended the church service In the course of his lecture the min- ster used an illustration in which were words, ‘‘A man can easily purchase 0 sparrows for threepence.”” The young man, after being absent or about three years, returned, and non the first opportunity attended vine service, Strange to say, he yard the same narrative by the same inister, At the close of the service the minis- rin his courtesy came and shook hands ith the youth, and asked him if he poticed any changes about the place. The young man, evidently quite un-| ncerned, replied, “Aye, man, ther wo or three chang hing IT can see-—tl iy thes price ame auld figg. »* sparrows is | —Homiletic A FEARSOME THREAT. From the el: ed by the ughest bo: sroom occur the Sunday school cam great uproar, T retary in the vxt_ room went in to investiga ‘omplete silence followed the opening f the classroom door. | you got a teacher?"" ju want oF Then be quiet or you'll get one.”* Result, comparative peace. — Man- lester Guardian, For PRICKLY HEAT Chafing, Sunburn, etc. —-USE—- PACKER’S TAR SOAP | Directions for local treatment: || To promptly relieve itching and smart- ing, cleanse thoroughly with Packer's Tar Soap, then apply a lather and pat dry with a towel, repeating as often as desired "This not only removes acrid I} ‘ecretions, but soothes the sensitive nerve endings in the skin and gives im- mediate relief The Packer Mig. Co., New York— but there’s yin |, uae Apollinaris THE QUEEN OF TABLE WATERS.” Funny Things Contemporaries Are Printing TONGUE TWISTERS. ‘A London paper recently offered a series of prizes for the best ‘“tongue- twisting’ sentences, The prize-win- ning contributions ar The bleak breeze blighted the bright broom blossoms, Two toads totally tired tried to trot to Tedbury. Strict, strong Stephen Stringer snared slickly six sickly silky snake Susan shineth shoes and socks; socks and shoes shines Susan. She ceaseth} shining shoes and socks, for shoes and socks shock Susan. A haddock, a haddock, a black-spotted haddock ; a black spot on the black back of a black-spotted haddock. Oliver Oglethorp ogled an owl and an oyster. Did Oliver Oglethorp ogle an owl and an oyster? If Oliver Oglethorp ogled an owl antl an oyster, where are the owl and the oyster Oliver Oglethorp ogled? {SURPRISED HIM. DOCTOR'S TEST OF FOOD. A doctor in Kansas experimented with his boy in a test of food and gives the particulars, He says “T naturally watch the effect of dif- ferent foods on patients. My own little son, a lad of four, had been ill with monia, and during his convalescence jot seem to care for any kind of food. “1 knew something of Grape-Nuts and its rather fascinating flavor, and particularly of its nourishing and nerve- building powers, so I started the boy on| Grape-Nuts and found from the first h that he liked ‘His mother gave it to him steadily and he began to improve at once, In s than a month he had gained about eight pounds and soon became so well and strong we had no further anxiety about him. “An old patient of mine, 73 years came down with serious stomach ind before I was called had got he could eat almost nothing, | jous cond| He had 1 almost every kind of food for the sick without avail, “1 immediately put him on Grape- Nuts, with good, milk and just a little pinch of sugar. He exclaimed when I came next day, ‘ Why, doctor, I never ate anything so good or that made me feel so much stronger." “Lam pleased to on Grape-Nuts, but he h for two or three weeks; then he to branch out a little with rice or an egg or two. He got entirely well in spite of his almost hopeless condit He gained 22 pounds in two months, which at his age is rkable “1 could quote a list of cas Nuts has worked wond “There's a Reason.” Read “ The Road to Wellville,”’ in packages, Ever read the above letter? Anew one | » They a nd tull of human intere: 1 to stick to it where rue, NEW WINE IN OLD BOTTLES. “When all of the jokes are written told, What shall we do?” sighed Pessimist, As tears from his eyclids rolled. “What shall we do?” grinned Optimist. “Just what we've done before. We'll change them around a little bit And grind them out once more. Independent. USUAL CAPER. A motor omnibus caused some little excitement last week in New Oxford Street by entering a tobacconist’s shop. | The fondness of some of these vehicles for smoking is an undoubted evil.— London Punch, In answering advertisements please mention Juncr. *| be smiling, complais Bottled only at the Spring, Neuenahr, Germany, and Only with its Own Natural Gas. “Hah! bean’ How much does sh * How should 1 kr Mrs. Kuochem Mr. Knockem— Mrs. Kuockem SHE WAS TOO QUICK FOR THEM. There were three at the little table in the café, a lady and two men, says the what tl they came up hei Cl eland Plain Dealer, uddenly the electric lights went out, and the lady quickly and noiselessly drew back. of a compound lights went u ntly.. “TL thought I heard a kis but nobody hen the me ** said the nly § 1 and looked painfully WAYS THAT ARE DARK. The man ran his eye over the casual assortment of cigars in the case at the| end of the bar, He was a stranger to all of the brands, “How's that two-for-a-quarter over in| e left-hand corner?” h ‘That's a dandy, boss,” said the col- ored gentleman who was officiating as bartender. ‘It's the kind I always moke,"* This sounded like a dubi mendation until he added, ‘*Wh you} want to get the best cigar in the house} just ask the bartender which cigar he| ‘smokes when the boss is out.""—E. the us recom- THE ADVANTAGE. Friend—' Why do you encourage these woman-suffrage mectings? Surely you) don’t approve of them?” Hushand—“Approve? With all my heart! I can come home as late as I ike now without finding my wife at are. An instant later there was the smack of As the electric ¢ ich man was scen to h home to ask questions."’—Fliegende Blaetter, It will be appreciated. UNBELIEVABLE. “Gosh! I guess those city folks meant -y suid when they told us that e to get a good rest. “They're taking it easy, eh?” ing it easy. 1 should say they Would you believe it, not a one m has got out of bed before six clock uny morning since the PHILIP MORRIS ORIGINAL LONDON CIGARETTES Those who smoke them are always glad to recommend them most to even the critical of fricnds CAMBRIDGE retslar size AMBASSADOR 35 ¢. GMer-dinner sine “The Little Brown Kex."" comicbooks.com