Judge, 1909-04-03 · page 12 of 16
Judge — April 3, 1909 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple unrelated satirical pieces typical of Judge magazine's format. **"The Wallflower"** (center): A narrative poem mocking an unmarried woman at social events. The satire targets the predictable plight of single women in the era—she attends parties hoping to be noticed but remains overlooked, watching other couples while "going on (expecting 'em) for ever." The joke critiques both her persistent, hopeless optimism and society's narrow marriage-focused expectations for women. **"The Centenaried Poe"** (lower left): A humorous poem celebrating Edgar Allan Poe's literary legacy while mocking the overwrought critical attention surrounding centenary celebrations. It playfully reduces highbrow literary discourse to repetitive "wrangle" about whether his work is "good or no." The remainder consists of advertisements (Pears' Soap, Boston Garter, Hoffmann House) interspersed with miscellaneous humorous short pieces and illustrations.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Shea rs and Paste Pot "ESTABLISHED 1810 i STYLE NEA ESS tue tate rari m THE WALLFLOWER. THE IMPROVED BOSTON ssatt, at adinner at Perennial bud, accustomed long to Philadelphia Country Club, was ‘The mural shelter of the uninvited. 1 his opinion of women ‘viding If of her charms we hesitate to speak, e back astride. Her hopes, at any rate, remain un- Rye don't altogether favor it," said Mr. blighted. | Cassatt, “It sometimes leads to con- She trips it still, though her fantastic toe Te aaten Has lost the lightness of its first en- “+L was driving one afternoon on Lan- a lost th Produced by skill and prac- viol ran ve Snitited ‘bay pod For men ‘come(sometimes) and men tice through violently from a spirited bay horse. i ‘Com WHT The Name is stomped | J uckily the accident happened in front add emer ety ou ouury, on every oop — Be ue en en the proprietor ran But she Koes on (expecting ‘em) for Swed of experience. of a pharmacy. The proprietor fae, . a S hers. forth with his clerk. He propped up vee | Without exag THE 4 of the unconscious rider, and, Once more we watch her in her mellow MM geration, we 4g a gold cigare: ase Lying. on tl z % believe it to be CUSHION round, he took it up and read, *P. S. around at their infrequent | Y the best whis- BUTTON CLASP ive of a Vanguard M body any- where. Browne, 183% Walnut S rand boy, Or looking (in the L LIES FLAT TO THE LEO— e, 1838 Walnut Sweety sugge NEVER SLIPS, TEARS, ROR t, that her hus! skiddi Gurasrens “But just then a tiny gold hand mir- Or sitting out, and, with engaging slang, Worn All Over The World ror, with a powder-pull attachment, fell Voicing her girlish preference for a ened catconeet m the rider's trousers pocket, and the ices; > led, Or toying pertly with a pink me aburgh, Pa. gue, GLORCE FROST CO, Jack, I mean telephone Mr. Browne Of which a simple crumb or two suf Beaton, Mas HE that Mra. Browne hax fallen’— fi INSIST ON HAVING THE GENUINE But at this point the clerk, who had We watch her partners—men who never REFUSE ALL SUBSTITUTES n burning a feather under the rider's shrink, nose, tickled her lips with it, and she Courtiers whom coy antiquities deter fs ' - led and murmured, ‘Jim not Siratyn 9 Jephone Mr. and Mrs. Browne Who utter blithely, ‘This is ours, I that Miss Browne has fallen off her think.” : ear ier —Kverybody's Magazine. | While wishing most profoundly that S it were not. eee THE CENTENARIED POE. It is the same in Hornsey or Mayfair— J SEXOLOGY noe yy | Hear the critics talk of Poe In either grade, the middle or the ; wie No impurity in Pears EA. Pos. pier ‘imparts ta a Soap. What a world of merriment is this cen- If youth is on the hop she’s always there, y . | - ‘tenary show! ‘Ard some one's got to take her in to Keowee ¢ Yount Husband Should Have Economical to use. What a wrangle, °, wrangle supper! Knowledge a Father Should Impart tolls Son. Vinee » literary sheets! —Punch, Beatles Caouletts 5 Resband Sheald Baye It wears out only for Knowledge a Young Woman Should Have. lean s then try fo mangle; WAS A HEN. Koowleats ¢ Methr Should Mares your comfort and cleanli- is all a-tangle HEN: [peep org oor] a ‘ As to his artistic f Little Harry, with his sister and |] Medical Knowledge « Wile Should Have. or it’s time, time brothers, was being taught natural hi jebrate in rhyme, tory by ‘the ss through the in- To moot the mighty question, if his strumentality of a game, The game work is good or no called ‘*Barnyard.’” One child was —— — It ix Poe, Poe, Poe, Pe duck, another # turkey, and a third a Born a hundred years ag on—anoisy, delightful game. “ALIS WELL ‘THAT ENDS WELL.” A wrangle and a tangle over Poe! | But little Harry re in all the 7 5 tumult, as still as d Far off ina Fee Ce eee Poe corner he crouched, silent and aloni ight he know ! governess, sp: pprou brants bestow! Harry, and play with us,” Hear the speakers clear their throats, | answered Harry: ‘*'m lay And consult their little notes! The Independent | laud:him to the skies! . | prize, prize All he wrote! sent ura favor Abiaat sinters tives wo rape fra 1 How they dote On his “Raven” and his “Bells BIBLICAL TREATMENT. How they quote ha hy ‘ Gaetan ast te eesk ty Dr. c. H. Parkhurst, the eloquent New Or hiay ork clergyman, at a banquet of ar |ligious club, said of charity, Hoffman House gene ii MADINIY SQUUANE, NEW YOIK 7a His catalogue of triumphs with a breast ‘00 many of us, perhaps, misinte { pret the meaning of charity as a certain | deacon misinterpreted a Scriptural text. < | “This deacon, a pillar of the Western) > Ss =, Sold in every land. Daughter-—* Hold on tight, mother! I x to turn out for that man coming Absolutely Firepréot All aglow, Praising Poe, Po Poe, Poe Poe, | church, entered in his journal, | Their thrice-inspired Poe, agers j ne The only son of genius that we ever had, | man te ealy ye age ‘ u know! yeso it's natural to blow thy cloak ale The trumpet blast of Poe, iventiin the seco ofr . Poe, Poe, arbi: te ene | > Poe, Poe, Poe! For perhaps ten days or so, H SEE DUN OR BRADSTREET. Man on skis—"These women never do Of emotion and commotion over Poe! | “Can two people live on a salary of know enough to turn the right way. —-Exchange, quoted in Christian En- clgh As sella aw ck?" hh deavor World. “It depends very largely on the finan- cial conditions of the girl's father.""— A Rare Book of Humor FACE VALUE. j Chieage Herald. Is a bound volume of JUL soe cecarnlantine Jim sent me's check |. Dorrnow! The best binder on the market is | PQ Pe Mnillion Kisses.” | If-you've planned a glad surprise, What did you do with it Do it how : the one we are sending our sub- | «Got Jack to cash it.’—Cleveland ‘Do it now; ; scribers for $1 This amount |! peau, * jeveicn If you're going to try to rise, includes all charges for postage, |) “tr: sean eat | ete. Address that “‘ten’” haunts you to-day ‘THE suDGE co ~ ena Bp tanens (Borrowed in the far-away), | a E CO. ¢ bride appeared in a smart white And you want to pay me, say, i} “Ge - 225 FitthAvenue New York | frock of pale blue linen.—Australian Doitnow. ° Fond mather—"God bless you may chil re dren, may you always live in peace. Western Mail, | —Boston Herald, | sd 70 w Fliceende Blactter. comicbooks.com