Judge — January 12, 1907 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

GOOD PLACE TO LEAVE. 46VES, siree !" exclaimed the vigorous individual ; «I came from Dangerous Gulch, Montana.” «That's very commenda- ble," remarked the meek-look- ing man quietly. * ALL THE SAME EITHER WAY, Temperance-worker —"\t you didn’t drink you could own that automobile.” Bum —* Ah, but that would drive me to it!” SWIFT JUSTICE ON A Pl y, A PARTY of tourists was y viewing the scene of the = ae cholera’s ravages in India. i “And,” concluded the 1 JUDGE'S FAVORITES. guide, “the superstitious na- WELENE LACKAYE WITH “THE MEIR TO tives believe that when night THe HOORAM. : : You play where riches 40 abound, comes on thé Spirits of the de- Where gold just clutters up the ground; _ parted still come back to revisit Where all the men and maids are pearls, the scenes of earthly life, bring- And you are richer far than earls. hahaa A For they who laugh away our cares ing with them again seeds ot Are this old world’s true millionaires. the dread plague that carried “Well, madam, you see people are not quite so liberal in paying for g them hence.” odd Jobs like this the first few weeks after Christmas." ‘Hal™ exclaimed the wild-eyed traveler, who frequented the vaudeville houses when at home, “cholera in phantom—eh, what?” A JOB FOR THE ASSISTANT M.D. And that explains why the bunch of tourists that visited the place Patient (dismally)— Doctor, I am tired of living.” : Celebrated m.d.—** Then I'll turn you over to my young assistant.” THE SLOW TIME OF THE YEAR. “ How is it you haven't been around this month to clean off this next day found a new-made grave among the ancient tombs. THE BRAVE VOYAGE, WONDERFUL CONQUEST, AND SAD FATE OF ROBINSON CARUSO. L “ IL. H SAILED from stnny Italy ‘Xo dulcet were the silver notes That rippled from his throat, The little fishes came in shoals A lute upon his knee. To dance around the boat. He captivated, when he sang, But ere the voyage was complete The captain and the crew so, bY A gale arose and blew $0, They steered the vessel wrong— The ship was wrecked, and all his name were lost Was Robinson Caruso, But Rebinson Caruso. Across the rolling sea, A feather in his velvet cap, m. He made the luckless monkeys But, drifting un a broken spar, fetch } But, sitting with his hairy friends And singing all the while, u And carry night and day, And watching for a sail The tuneful troubadour at last Be | And march behind him when he One bright and sunny morning, lo! Beheld a barren isle. , walked See He suddenly turned pale. He landed on the coral strand, rs And fan the flies away. 4 That lonely isle he nevermore And liked the pleasant view so In short, he trained them with a N Would leave behind he knew, so That of the place he took com- f club 3 He died within the monkey-house, mand, Until the simians grew so y Poor Robinson Caruso! Did Robinson Caruso. They waited on the beck and call 4, A HEEXHA IRVENG. “——~ ff Of Robinson Caruso. RECIPROCITY IN BUSINESS. THE SURFEIT OF KNOWLEDGE. N a little town in northern Pennsylvania—Athens by name—there is First New Yorker—* Have you ever indulged in a ‘ seeing-New- a photographer's establishment on Main Street containing the win- York’ auto ride?” Half a block farther on there is a sign Second New Yorker—No, sir. I've lived here too long to want dow-sign, ** Tank Developer.” e to know as much about it as that.” across the pavement, ++ Gold Cure.” . UNCLE CYRUS SPRINGS HIS NEW LAST-LAUGH DEVICE WITH MUCH SATISFACTION comicbooks.com