Judge, 1906-05-19 · page 4 of 16
Judge — May 19, 1906 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
The page contains three distinct sections: 1. **"Uncle Sam to Gorky et al."** - A poem where Uncle Sam addresses Russian authors (likely Maxim Gorky and others), asserting American freedom and rejecting tyranny. This appears to reference early 20th-century Russian political/literary figures, contrasting American democratic values with Russian authoritarianism. 2. **"One Merit of Golf"** and **"Geese and Ganders"** - Brief satirical pieces mocking golf as exercise and making a gender-based joke about historical credit (geese saving Rome versus ganders receiving credit). 3. **"Giving Instructions"** - A cartoon showing a baseball captain instructing a young player, with humor about hitting technique. The page reflects Judge magazine's typical mix of political commentary on US-Russia relations and lighthearted domestic satire about recreation and gender dynamics.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
UNCLE SAM TO GORKY ET AL. Nore.—Twenty-five Russian authors have adopted a resola- tion solemly reciting that ‘the American authors have offended Russian authors in the persoa of Maxim Gorky, and Russian w manhood in the person of Madame Andreieva, by interfering with their private affairs, OU'RE all right, Mr. Gorky, On politics, and we Would like to see your Roosians Like we are—good and free. We ain't much here on tyrants, And don't respect a crown, Or throne, or royal sceptre, Except when they are down. We breathe the air of freedom— We've got it in our bones ; And we are always ready To throw a brick at thrones. We've'got a hand of welcome For all that are oppressed, And we are glad to comfort All them that are distressed. But freedom, all you Rovsians, Has got some limits, and We have some laws of marriage You ought to understand. We've somehow took the notion ‘That nations can’t be great Unless there’s homes and fam'lies To stand behind the state. Perhaps we're free and easy On soime p'ints, but on that Of man and wife we've got to Know just where they are at. Unless this is established Correct and marked O. K., The people of this na Will have some things to say. Perhaps we're some old-fashioned — But look at us and you In all that makes a nation United, strong and true! We guess we'll not be changing Our style to suit your size ; And, feeling as we're feeling, We'll not apologize. LeNvot. Husband and wife, father and mother, Home and children—there is no other Bond like this to hold together through all kinds of weather. FLIRTATIOUS. “Life's a jest, and all things show it. T thought so once, and now I know it.” ONE MERIT OF GOLF. SES, sir!" exclaimed the enthusiast ; golf is the best ever. It has a distinct domestic value that is not generally appreciated. We will suppose, for example, that a man has been celebrating a little too much and he wishes to round up and go home. Well, as a preliminary he goes to the golf-links to get the exercise. You will readily appreciate that there are occasions when exercise has a distinct and almost immediate value. Now, in practice, golf works out on the theory that the more exercise a man needs in these cir- cumstances the more he gets. The more uncertain he is in his drives the more walking he has to do, and the effect is decidedly beneficial, Of course there may still be a little some- thing noticeable about him when he gets home, but it is naturally attributed to the Scotch high-ball he took because of his weariness at the conclusion of the round. Oh, golf is surely a great game!" GEESE AND GANDERS. 44] T WAS the cackling of geese that saved Rome,” said Mrs, Henpeck bitterly, + but the ganders have done all the bragging about it.” GIVING INSTRUCTIONS. youse is up next, an’ it’s a tie score. Now, youse is gotter make a home run; but don’t hit de ball too hard, ‘cause