Judge, 1906-01-13 · page 3 of 16
Judge — January 13, 1906 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**Top illustration ("Buncoed"):** Shows two women in an office setting. The dialogue reveals a domestic financial dispute: a husband emptied their account out of fear his wife would be robbed by burglars. The satire mocks both marital distrust and the era's anxieties about crime and wealth security. **Left cartoon ("Utterly Impossible"):** Depicts a parson refusing alcohol from "Deacon Johnson," with dialect-heavy dialogue. This likely satirizes temperance debates or religious hypocrisy regarding alcohol consumption—common Judge targets in the early 20th century. **Right section ("A Wedding-Gift for Miss Alice"):** Discusses gift ideas for Princess Alice's upcoming nuptials, suggesting coal as an alternative to expensive presents. This appears to mock either the impracticality of gift-giving for royalty or American attitudes toward British nobility.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
= BUNCOED. “Yes: her husband robbed her of every cent she had."* “Poor dear! UTTERLY IMPOSSIBLE. «DEACON JOHNSON,” said de par- son ‘en de deacon cum f'um town, top dere, Deacon Noah Johnson Set dat jug ob yo'wn right down! + Now, good deacon," «*Pears ter me youse fell f*um grace. Tell me wot yo" got hyar, deacon — Tell me right now, face ter face!" ‘aid de parson, Wisht yo'd seed dat cullud deacon Ez he raised his head an’ said, « Dis hyar is Plant, « Who it b'long to?” axed de parson— “Who it bilong to? Ansah quick!” An de parson struck de bittahs Wil a great big walkin’-stick. + Do, pray, parson,” said de deacon, Jes’ ez humble ez could be, + Onecha’f b'longs ter Deacon Walker ; Tothah ha’f it b'long ter me.” “ Ain't yo’ promus'd me, Br'er Johnson, Dat yo’ want gwine drink no mo’? Now, yo’ take dat jug dis minnit An’ right out yo'r ha'f, sah, po'.” «4 Jes’ can't do it,” said Br’er Johnson Ez he let his conscience drop, “Cause yo" see mine ’s at de bottom An’ Br’er Walker's ha'f ’s on top!" SILAS Xx. FLOYD. 46THEY had only been engaged a week when he borrowed money from her father.” + Why did he wait so long?” And all she married him for was because she was afraid of burglars.” A WEDDING-GIFT FOR MISS ALICE, THE approaching nuptials of our Princess Alice have touched the sen- timent of the American people, and there seems to be a very gen- eral desire to give her an appropriate wedding-present. ‘The Oregon suggestion to collect $800,000 has been frowned upon by Papa Roose- ; but we understand that when Mr. ++ Nick" Longworth heard of it he exclaimed, +* That would be fine!" We can see how, in similar circumstances, we might, on the impulse of the moment, derive pre- cisely the same impression. The Hazleton miners are going to send the bride a car-load of nice coal. That's a fine present, and we might all chip in and make it a hundred car-loads. Or each trade might make its own present—the architects a house, the painters paint to put on it; the furniture men could put in tables, sideboards, chairs, a cradle, parlor-sets, every thing suitable fora Roosevelt home. Something from the American peo- ple seems to us to be demanded asa token of our ad- miration for the daughter of the White House. JUDGE'S sugges- tion is a statuette of herself as a bride, to be made of gold contrib. uted, in coin or otherwise, by the people. MORE ENTICING. Kirry—""Hain't yer goin’ ter de party?" Micxey- jaw; not when I kin see a swell auto- mobile funeral jist round de corner."