Judge — October 14, 1905 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

, A JUGGLER UNSUNG. /REFLECTIONS OF A CHAMBERMAID. YALLER man ain't got no chance onless he's bo'n a Jap, ANY are called and few are up before noon, "Cayse den he makes de money in de easies' kind ob way. It’s a long hall that has no urn in. Ten minutes on de stage Men must work and women must sweep. En de Jap he's got his w Coming agents send their baggage hefore. But a dahkey 's got ter hustle night en day. ; ; CAN'T CURE LAMENESS. 64BLLA thinks that Christian science can. cure , anything, doesn’t she ? ) ‘AYes; but I notice that her excuses are as Al's gettin’ mighty weary totin’ dishes twell Ah drap, A.wastin’ all mah sweetness on de air ob dis hotel. Ah wish Ah could engage Fo’ de operatic stage ; Ah'd show dem Japs some jugglin’ what am swell, lame as ever. MAKING IT CLEAR. «s] COULD nev. er under- stand why they de- scribe the two hotel systems as American and European,” says the man with the red ears. “I's just the same as the sys- tem of taxation 1s on the two continents,” explains the man with the red nose, white hair and blue eyes. + How's that?” ‘Under the European plan you pay sometimes a good deal more than you need to pay for what you get, while under the American plan you often pay for a good deal more than you have any chance of gettin; STRANGE BUT TRUE, RS. WHOOPEM-UPP, the well-known lecturer, last Tuesday delivered an address before the Earnest Mothers Club on the topic, The home training of chil- NEXT AND NEXT. To do this it was necessary that she leave her Mr. Wnoopanrant—"' | wonder how long it is going to take us to get to the next at home in charg year-old s place of entertainment? eving at home inebargr-of their nineyearsold sister: Mr. Foote Licurs—"' Yes: and how long is it going to take us to get next to the Before leaving she had been so engrossed in studying next place of entertainment?” her paper that she forgot to put away the scissors or to hide the matches. Obviously, it was to he expected that the children PAID THE PENALTY. would have cut the curtains to strips, jabbed one another's eyes out, . suh,” said Colonel Bluddangoah of Kentucky, lapsing into and wound up by setting fire to the house, one of the roomy leather chairs in the club lounging-room ; When she turned the corner to go to her home the children met «yes, suh, Hyuh’s a letteh fom mah nevvew, an’ it gives me just her, and each of them was as neat and clean as when she left to go the news L expected f'om him, suh, 1 told him fo" yeahs ago that if to the club. + he didn't pay mo’ attention to his health he would be made to pay of Lewes dren.” deably fo" his neglee “And now ? + Now, suh, he’s been sent off to one o” these hyuh mine‘al-spring places an’ fo'ced to drink wateh, sul; an’ wuss than that, suh, to pay fo'ty do}lahs a week fo" drinkin’ the stuff, suh.”” LIKES THE WATER-WAGON Ord Mrs. Buzzruzz—" Mercy me! this is the last time I'll ever adopt a water-bug. I no more than get her dressed up than she runs under the water-wagon to play.” comicbooks.com