Judge, 1905-07-15 · page 12 of 16
Judge — July 15, 1905 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertisements and light humor pieces**, not political cartoons. The main illustrated story, "Romance of a Liquid Pistol," is a comedic anecdote about a middle-aged spinster in upstate New York. The joke: She fears burglars but dreads actually shooting someone, so she buys a "liquid pistol" (water gun)—a non-lethal weapon. When a stranger appears at her property, she impulsively shoots him before thinking. Expecting outrage, she's surprised when he laughs. He turns out to be a respectable farmer, and they marry. The satire targets **Victorian anxieties about women and violence**—the contradiction between wanting self-defense and feminine reluctance to cause harm. The "liquid pistol" is a genteel compromise: defensive without being genuinely dangerous. The resolution (marriage to the "victim") plays on period romantic conventions. The other items are puns and brief jokes about everyday situations—no political content. The page is essentially a humor magazine mixed with period advertising for whiskey, jewelry, electrical equipment, and picture books.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
MESELAKLALA ALAS LASEK ELEC 2) Kept down—preserved feathers. Does figure work—the dressmaker's : model. The pink of propriety—a modest girl's W blush. Fits and starts—a tailor-made travel- ing dress. The hens come home to roost—and so do the roosters When the acrobat masters the somer- Ph sault, he does himself a good tur: il. adelphia Bulletin scar Aenea ORGANIST, THAT’S ALL! A few weeks ago a farmer, who is also organist of a certain church, while trying to recall the rather intricate harmony of an anthem he had in practice, hung the milk-pail on a nail driven into a rafter and started to milk the cow into the lighted lantern.—Ram's Horn. ROMANCE OF A LIQUID PISTOL. aT Last & In a certain hamlet in the Empire state lives a middle- ui. Miami to th 4 f. aged spinster who has a special horror of firearms and an Pes fossil ‘ come to the infinite dread of burglars. Her lively fear of burglars ee 2% moves her mightily to possess herself of the usual weapon Mtr. Henpeck — Thank heaven !"— ¥ of protection, but a Stull livelier fear that she might elt New York Sun. mL 4 some poor fellow in a moment of agitation stands in the way. Between these conflicting alarms the poor woman was almost beside herself, and when she learned that there was a liquid pistol on the market—a revolver that would | wi rr shoot pretty nearly a pint of water in a burglar’s fac (AES iamon S with such a vigorous spontaneity and celerityof move. The Highest nutrient quality is found in Hunter altimore Ry which is made from the choicest of selected grain, most carefully and scientifically distilled and undergoes thorough ageing be- fore it is sold, ON CREDIT ment as to give him the surprise of his life—she was actu- are ally overjoyed. On the day the water-gun arrived she had her first opportunity to A DIAMOND || ¥%¢it._A fellow came and stood in the door-yard, and the very thought that she was now equipped so she could shoot a man without really doing him much damage made her over-hasty, and before she really intended, and without knowing ex- actly what the man was after, she had blazed away. The man was so surprised he started to run, then, real- izing he wasn’t shot, he stopped and blinked through the water dripping down his face at the woman stand- ing on the porch. Then the humor of the situation oy be dawned on him and he laughed and she laughed. It Guta ee 1D illustrations, ‘aad oar Bo turned out that he was a respectable farmer and well- Diamor Klet—We will mall both free} | to-do, and— Fhe a . Well, to make a long story short, the wedding came off one day this week, S555 355 4 (AAA Aeecexcecceececeeseeceeeeeceeceececeeeceeeceesees, Sold at all first-class calés and by jobbers. WM. LANAHAN & SON, Baltimore, Md. FFSSSSSSSSSSS iq) RoR REDBPSEEEEEEDSSESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEDEDSSSSSS55995 ¥ ¥ x ¥ ¥, > SEESESESESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSTA PERFECT IGNITION 1 We give our signed guarantee of value with ‘Terms easiest; quality of soods| | NOW READY... asks fo “THIS @ THAT” U.S. A. posers Tig SYSTEM recived Highest About Caricatare LIQUID PISTOL By ZIM: attaaes Sant tart, 3 AER ae NM tivem, om. A book of sound advice for the| {27 ‘comic-art studen You will et more prompt attention and better service ry $1.50 by mail Dy mentioning JUEGE wien answermg adveruisements. Address Es Zim, Horseheads, N. ¥. Parker, Searas & Satioe, 20 South Sex Dept. E, New York A DEN is no longer considered the luxury it once was—it is now a necessity in every home where comfort is placed first. Unframed pictures play an important part, if skillfully used. Send two 2-cent stamps for our illustrated Blue Booklet on Inexpensive Dens. It is full of valuable hints. Special Combination Offer for Den Work. We will send prepaid to any address in the United States, upon receipt of TWO DOLLARS, the follow- ing beautiful copyrighted pictures : Three delicately tinted reproductions of Stanlaws’s beautiful water- color paintings, on fine paper, about 15 x 8; four of Stanlaws’s pen-a ink studies, heavy coated paper, 14% x 1034, suitable for framine; four of James Montgomery Flagg’s American Girl Series, sepia tints «n heavy plate paper, 1134 x 934; three groups of Flagg’s miniaturc< printed on fine card-board—one two-head, one three-head and one four-head group; and four Motto Cards, with small cut in upper le't- hand corner, suitable for illuminating or as gift cards, printed on he board, 734.x6. If colored by hand, they will make beautiful gi Address Picture Department, Judge Company, 225 Fourth Avenue, New York. meh, use ALLEN'S FOUT-EASE. | Ina Pinch, use ALLEN’S FOOT-EASE. | Ima Pinch, use ALLEN’S FOOT-EASE. | In a Pinch, use ALLEN’S FOOT-EASE- | comicbooks.com