Judge, 1899-10-14 · page 6 of 16
Judge — October 14, 1899 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains four separate satirical vignettes typical of early 20th-century American humor: **"The Business Way"**: A playwright complains he can't sell his plays. A junkman boasts he could sell them better—mocking both struggling artists and aggressive salesmen who oversell worthless goods. **"Voluptuously Angelic"**: A newspaper publisher proposes Sunday editions featuring religious paintings of angels and heaven to seem more moral. The managing editor notes such classical paintings typically depict nude figures—satirizing hypocritical attempts at respectability that backfire. **"Rival Functions"**: Two brief domestic anecdotes about social embarrassment (a phantom party, a cholera incident). **"Hardly Likely"**: A tramp seeking food tells a widow he's a "poor wayfarer." When she expresses disappointment he's not a gentleman, he indignantly asks if she mistakes him for a lady—mocking class pretensions and gendered assumptions. The humor relies on irony, misunderstandings, and social commentary about business ethics, respectability, and class distinctions in Edwardian America.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE BUSINESS WAY, ScrtupteR—"' I have a whole trunkful of plays that I cannot sell.” * That is because you litterateurs are such poor business men. Now I'll warrant could get a junkman up there inside of ten minutes.” VOLUPTUOUSLY ANGELIC. +4] BELIEVE,” said the publisher of the metropolitan daily, “that we should give our Sunday edition a more moral and religious tone. People generally are kicking on its sensationalism. I believe that hereafter we had better devote a few pages each Sunday to reproductions of famous paintings of heaven and scenes representing angels.” replied the managing editor, “that would be quite an innovation. Would it take?” “Take? The figures in such scenes are always nude, or nearly so.” RIVAL FUNC- TIONS. © © MY daughter is M about to give a phantom par- ty,” said Mr. Gild- ersleeve. “ My baby gave a cholera-infantum CHoLLy (despondentiy)—" My uncle has reused PTY last night, to have anything more to do with me.” cut in Mr. Sterling- Eprru—** Then may L ask you what time it is?” worth. HARDLY LIKELY. ~* MERCY!" ejaculated the plump and pleasing Widow Huggins, who had opened the door in response to a knock, expecting to find the young minister waiting without. ‘* Who are you?” “Iam a poor wayfarer, maddim,” gallantly replied old Soiled Spooner, “ dat is perishin’ fer de want uv a square meal.” “ Pshaw! I expected to see a gentleman when I opened the door.” “I hope you don’t take me for a lady?” replied the tramp in an injured tone. 5 “Carrie, what makes yer allers leave yer shoes where I'll stumble over 'em?” comicbooks.com