Judge, 1899-07-01 · page 11 of 18
Judge — July 1, 1899 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains primarily **humorous verse and jokes** rather than political cartoons. The main content includes: **"When the Band Plays 'Dixie'"** — A nostalgic poem celebrating how the patriotic Southern anthem "Dixie" stirs emotional responses, especially among Civil War veterans. This reflects post-Spanish-American War era nostalgia and sectional reconciliation. **"A Song of Summer"** — A complaint about inconsiderate streetcar passengers who refuse to move, satirizing urban rudeness. **Various short jokes** about salary negotiations, soap-borrowing, and social behavior—typical of the era's light humor magazine format. The page is **mostly advertising** for products like Sohmer pianos, Evans ale, Chester suspenders, Packer's Tar Soap, and Wilson Whiskey. The references to "Manila" and "Spanish prisoners" indicate this is from the early 1900s, during American colonial expansion in the Philippines following the Spanish-American War.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
WHEN THE BAND PLAYS “DIXIE. When the band plays “Dizie” as. they're marchin’ down the street The boys throw up their hats and yell, for “Dixie” 's hard to beat; An’ the fellers in the offices, they keep time with their feet When the band is playin’ Dixie” in the mornin’. A SONG OF SUMMER. 1 I sing the song of the open car ‘And the man at the end of the seat Who never is willing to move along | Oreven retract his feet. He sticks to his place—the selfish churl !— As if he were stuck with glue, | And his whole manner says, as plain as words, ** L don’t care a hang for you!” | Atuss Keene— Do you know, Mr. ‘tubbs, that vawze always reminds me of you?" A/r. Tubbs—* Of me? How's that?” Afiss Keene —"'Oh, it’s so large and shapely, and ™ Mr. Tubbs—"Abem! Yes?" Afiss Keene— “And there's never anything in it, you know.” Jewelers’ Weekly. * Ves,” said the visitor, *' I brought one cake of soap with me when I came to stay with Grace, and I told her I was going to leave when the soap was gone. And what do you think ’—the other day I caught Grace using that soap "—New York Evening Sun, The popularity of the Remington typewriter with the government was evidenced recently by an order for filty of the latest machines to go to Manila on the Sheridan. Bercnan’s Pits for lomach and Liver ills. Oh, he is a selfish, selfish man; T call him the end-seat hog. He's the sort of man who would kick a cat, Or torture a faithful dog. ‘The world will be better when he is dead When the band plays ‘* Dixie,” then the vet- erans so gray, ‘They sorter fall to dreamin’ of the battle far “Your salary, I believe, is two hundred and fifty dollars a week,” said the caller. It so happened that the star was in a confidential mood, and she replied, ** Well, one of them Marie (reading letter) — *To please you I would traverse oceans.” Oh, the brave fel- it their crutches while they're grocer. ** How did you enjoy the banquet?” ** Great, answered the young man with the red tie and | _ “And so you've decided to name your baby | yellow vest. “I got away with three spoons, ‘And laid on a tomb's dark shelf, holleria® "* Hooray!" is." “One of them?” "Yes." The salary 1] low! *D. s 1 am coming to see you to-mor- I hate and despise him with all my heart, When the band is playin’ * Dixie" in the| advertise is two hundred and fifty dollats a | rowil itdoesn’t rain.°"—Pardadelphia Inquirer, For 1 want that seat myself morni week, but the salary I get—well, that’s another —Somerville Journal. story." —Chicago Post. If any man who smokes When the band plays “Dixie,” oh, it stirs a any Dr. Siegert’s Angostura Bitters has over fifty feller’s soul ! imitators and substitutes—most of them dan- gerous, Get the genuine with signature. A woman who attended a prize-fight in New York the other night disguised as a man was detected by her manner of holding her cigar and was promptly ejected. ‘The managers of the fight were determined to have perfect order Tcan hear the boom of cannon, see the war- clouds round me roll ; An‘ I'm free to say, good people, that I lose my self-control When the band plays “* Dixie mornin’, in the They ain't no music like it on the land or on laughs at ‘you. Smile, and you treat th crowd."—Whiladelphia North American, eral.‘ What have you been doing ?” ing an inventory I don't know whether t “Laugh,” says Sinicus, ‘tand the world ‘It's hard work,” remarked a Filipino gen- * Take pat down this lot of left-over Spanish prisoners cigars will ‘‘keep tab” of the number of half- smoked to, 15 and 20 cent cigars he throws 10 the sea, as assets or liabilities."— Washington and decorum, and would not tolerate the pres-| An' they're playin’ it continual in this country away in one day he ence of any person who held a cigar awkward- cf the free? ly.—Kochester Union, No perfect happiness without perfect health— no perfect health without Abbott's, the Origi- nal Angostura Bitters. Ask your druggist or James, have you?" “* Yes; but of course we Shall call him Jim right from the start.”” ** Why have you such a decided preference for that It’s a hallelujah season to the very soul o' me When the band plays “Dixie” in the mornin’. —Frank L. Stanton in Atlanta Constitution, a salt-shaker and a sugar-bowl."—/ndianapolis Journal. will realize why the BETWEEN THE ACTS name? Wel you see, I want to give him] | Clerzymam (a he gets out of barber's chairl— a fair show. Jim, you know, rhymes with him, |** That's an awful dull razor you shaved me L vim, tron, ite, eim, Fen sien, whic, din, Barber (one of clergytan’s parishion- ITTLE CIGARS limb, swim, and probably a lot of other words that T can't think of just now; so if he ever does anything worth mentioning the poets will not be likely to overlook it."— Chicago Times- Herald, He is one of the commanding Figures of the war, For he commands, at column rates, Some fifty dollars per. —Detvoit Journal, “Was my sermon long this morning?" asked a preacher who had been taken to task for run- T hope it isn’t quite as dull as your ser- mon was yesterday." — Boston Courier. ** Women who weai lasses or spectacles are always congenial.” ‘Yes; they like to tell each other how they had to put them on long, long before age had anything to do with it "—Detroit Free Pres ye- For Picnics For Fishing For Camping For Yachting are made, and will un- derstand why they are so popular. They are acceptable becausc they are practical and ning over time, and who had carefully, kept For Cycling serve adefinite purpose Te cp ok the pachhioners heron age For Traveling —they save smoking an it only seemed so."—Boston Watchman, 9 expensive cigar when PURE, VaniS there is only time for REFRESHING, ae ashort smoke. 10 for ANTISEPTIC. |rue’aree omen toc. at all stores; 50 that’s always ready for soc. (stamps), de- For all-round hygienic exceilence | THE ALE li ACE, no cleansing agent compares with for eyety body: ivere: ree at your you cant upocte seta Sataple pairs poutpeid on receipt ot office, club or house. Packer’s- : Tar Soap. THE CELEBRATED SOHMER HEADS THELIST or THE HIGHEST GRADE PIANOS. It in ‘the favorite of the artists and the refined musical public. SOHMER & GO., Piano Manufacturers New York Warercoms, SOHMER BUILDING FIFTH AVENUE, COR. 220 STREET. BOTTLED IN BOND.” OLD OVERHOLT Retaining the Sweet, Natural Flavor of . the Rye. A. OVERHOLT & CO., g, Pa. Speaking of Andrew Carnegie’s denial of the report that he said, “' The man who dies rich is disgraced,” the Buflalo Express says, "* Then he missed a’ chance to say a good thing” He missed the chance of saying a mean and a false thing, and that is a good chance to miss. A sententious lie is no better than a verbose one Scarf-tastener free to purchasers who also eed ‘ame of their furalsher who does not keep them. CHESTER SUSPENDER 5 Deoatun Ave. Roxbury Crossing, Mass. American Tobacco Co., §07-529 W. 22d St., New-York City. Wisdom without wit is like meat witho salt. —Rochester Sunday Herald, ut) + MONEY to Pi through our ad 00d IDE. be secured Reien fedoras daltinore: Ma. ‘THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., Baltimore Ma. —Rochester Democrat. Established 1823. WILSON WHISKEY. That’s All! © Six Trains Daily for Chicago-NEW YORK CENTRAL. J comicbooks.com