Judge — March 12, 1898 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

¢ THEATRE-HATS AGAIN. MANAGER—"* So you want to be an actress ‘Asrixant—" Yes; I want to elevate the stag MANAGER—" No need of that, my dear young lady: it is high enough if you ladies will only remove your hats. EASY TO TELL. N BEING asked what letter comes after A, vee Beth replied quickly, The one that stings, OUT OF CREASE. QD! cruel fate! it seems to me You're too unkind by far. Though I am by my tailors pressed, My trousers never are. TRUE LOVE’S NEW JOLT. Maud —" But why have you broken an en- gagement that scemed in every way so suitable?” Ethel—* Bur it wasn't suitable, though to the chance observer, who only knew our fortunes and religion and temperaments and general tastes, it might seem so. But Tom rides a Temkillon wheel and I can’t bear anything but ihe Washtonia, and we never could have agreed on a tan dem.” A PROBLEM. [ WONDER why the wrinkles on wifey’s face I see. She hasn't had a birthday since eighteen eighty-three. AN INSPIRATION, Dick—" What's the use of making resolutions? They break so easy they won't bear transportation into next week.” Charley —"That's so; bot I've fixed things. Instead of good ones I'm mak- ing bad resolutions, and now when they smash what a saint. I'll be!" Brotuer Jaci 1, Jack Bourrown—"" Ah, there comes one of those poor Turks. | Poor A CRUEL FATE. Mas. O'TooLe—" Faith, an’ it’s th’ harrad luck thot pursues th’ Kerrigans. Tin shtories aff a shlate roof falls owld man Kerrigan yishterday an’ niver hurrts himsilf at all—an’ wid sivin hoondred dollars’ worth av insurance an th’ loife av “im.” A CRUSHING CASUALTY. devil ! I'll give bim a quarter for luck.” do anything for ‘em.” ANTICIPATORY. ‘Aren't you a bit previous dressing in black 7” 2, JAck Bourrows—"* Confound my luck ! I forgot those fellows always salam when you A WINTER CAMEO, OLD winter whines and whistles A light and airy jig Which agitates the bristles Upon the spotted pig. The wistful whiffet wheezes Upon the drift of snow ; ‘The madcap music freezes JVithin the rooster’s crow. The snowbirds gayly frolic Around the tulip-tree, And on the parabolic ‘The bullock skims the lea. Although the fairy plumber Athwart my vision flits, ‘The sunshine of the summer My rosy fancy hits. And all my triumph 's stellar, And joy is in my soul, Because I know the cellar Is fall of wood and coal, His sisteR—"* Oh, I don’t know. You know as well as I do that my husband left for the Klondike with only eighty dollars,”* comicbooks.com