Judge — February 12, 1898 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Suape JUDGE'S FABLES. THE FOX AND THE GRAPES. 'AIN fox sat look- ing long and lovingly at a beautiful bunch of grapes that hung out of reach on the orchard wall. Did this fox phil- osophically trot off, pro claiming them sour grapes? Not he, but patiently bided his time until an exceedingly homely maiden passed that way, whose face was so homely as to cause the aforesaid beautiful bunch of grapes to drop off and to be devoured by the “up-to-date fox.” Moral — Everything ret _# — } comes to him who waits. BASE OF SUPPLIES CUT OFF. ts] PRESUME you will now give up writing jokes for the high-priced funny papers, Mr. Rehashem >” “Why, not at all, What do you mean to insinuate by that remark?" he angrily inquired. = “Oh, nothing; only I heard that the fire in your flat last night destroyed NOT THE REAL THING. all your old scrap-books.” Prornintor (angrily)—"" Here, waiter! what did you give that gen- tleman Swiss cheese for? I heard him ask for Limburger.”” WAITER (timidly)—"" If you please, sir, the Limburger wouldn't STILL IN BONDAGE. Se TIED to my lady's apron-sirings.” 1 used to hear them say ; But maidens never wear suah things In our enlightened day. Yet when I kneel low at her feet To tie her little shoe, That very knot, so trig and neat, Has tied my heart-strings too. ae A SHOPPER FROM SHOPPERSVILLE. = Aggie—" Why, Ethel! you are going dread- fully out of your way. You can match that ribbon right across the street. Unctz Reswus—" Yes, colonel ; I's trubbled wif rheumatiz shuah wonderful how dem fowls Ethel—" Yes, | know; but let us try in all the A NEW USE FOR THE CRUTCH. 1, Cotoxt Sovrn—"* Hullo, uncle! Inevah noticed that you Resus (same night was lame." el"s coop) —"* Hit am powerful bad, sah—powerful bad.” Presist in roostin’on de top perch.” other stores first.”” / THE “ DEAD-GULCH” METHOD. Parner Pere (teho expects parental opposition)—"' 1 wants ter marry yer darter, ole man. Hope yer ain’t ergin me in the deal.” ce HIRE OLD MAN (slezely)—"" Wa-al, I wus ergin yer, Pete, afore I saw yer band ; but now I reckon I'll consider myself froze out an' let yer take ther stakes.” comicbooks.com