Judge — November 20, 1897 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Side A STORY WITH A MORAL. N A fashionable thoroughfare in the heart of the metropolis sat a beggar slowly turning the handle of a wheezy organ. His worn and tattered garments bore witness to the extremity of his poverty; a card upon his bosom called attention to his infirmity—for he was blind. A chill wind blew from the north and the scurrying clouds and falling temperature presaged a stormy night. An elegantly-appointed barouche with liveried footmen upon the box, silver trappings upon the harness, and golden monogram upon the door, drew up at the curb beside the beggar, and a lady, regally attired in silks and furs, stepped lightly therefrom, and as she did so her costly garments brushed the torn fabric of the mendicant. “ Wretch!” she cried disdainfully ; “could you not have chosen some other spot than this?” ‘The beggar listened pathetically, but said nothing. An aged philan- thropist who had spent a fortune upon just such worthy charities as these heard the unfeeling remark and ventured timidly to remonstrate. “Madam,” he said gently, “I am sure that if you had given this matter a moment's thought you would not have spoken so harshly to this ANOTHER KLONDIKE MURMUR. Ju Frizay—" Oh, why did I ever come to a land where icicles form on a cook-stove?” + UNSOPHISTICATION. # © YVILL you have your meat well done, or have itrare ?” Asked the waiter with a consequential air To young Hayseed, who was visiting the town ; And the latter, as he put his money down, Answered, “* Bring it rare, and thank you kindly, sir.” But his inner man experienced a stir When upon the dish the waiter brought he saw Steak so underdone he felt it must be raw. With his fork he turned it over, saying then, I. EmpLover—“' Now, it has been reported to me that a good deal of drinking is going on “If you please, sir, will it in?” among you workmen. Now, at noon I shall have the superintendent examine the pockets of every aaa acacia one, and upon whomsoever any liquor shall be found that man will be dismissed immediately.” 8 poor man. He is, as you can see, doing all he can to earn an honest livelihood. He doubtless has a wife, and perhaps children, depending upon him for sup- port. Ab, madam, how little you know about this class of people, and how little you dream of the barren pathos of their lives!” “ Sir!" cried the lady haughtily, fixing the aged philanthropist with a freezing glance and gathering her skirts more closely about her, “I think I know a little more about this case than you do—for this man is my husband and this is his turnout.” ¢. w, wast. A GOOD RECOMMENDATION. Mother —" Do you think Mr. Harvey is a nice young man?” Beatrice— Why, yes, mamma, He's been en- gaged to six of the swellest girls in the city. Savors Cees HONESTY THE BEST LAY. HE tramp at the back door is trying to tell the familiar gaunt woman with heavy-bowed spec- tacles that he is ill. She hasn't been in the funny papers for twenty years for nothing. “To what do you attribute your uncontrollable appetite for strong drink? Is it heredity ?” “No, mum,” says Waggles with a grin of re- lief; “it’s thurrst.” A SORT OF POSTSCRIPT. Bighead—"\ am disappointed in Hall Caine’s latest work of fiction.” Lightweight—" How so?” Bighead—" There was more fiction in the ad- III. Nobody discharged. vance notices than there is in the book.” comicbooks.com