Judge, 1897-11-20 · page 4 of 16
Judge — November 20, 1897 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains several satirical pieces typical of early 20th-century American humor: **"Not in It"** mocks the celebration of English as the "mother tongue" while completely ignoring fathers' linguistic contributions—a lighthearted gender critique. **"Exposed"** tells of a charming man at a resort who captivates women until a woman finds a *safety pin* in his handkerchief, revealing he's a married man from Brooklyn. The satire targets both masculine deception and the shallow romanticism of resort culture. **"The Foot-Ball Player's Advantage"** presents a heavenly scene where a half-back's tackling skills literally drive someone into hell's lake of fire—absurdist satire on football's violence. **"Statistically Mild"** defends football's safety by claiming more Americans die annually from cyclones than football injuries—dark humor about statistics being used to minimize genuine dangers. The page reflects early 20th-century preoccupations: gender relations, suburban domesticity (Brooklyn), and the emerging brutality of American football.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Sudge NOT IN IT. HOW wttthe praises have been sung About our glorious mother- tongue ! Of father-toogue we never ear ; He never had a chance, I fear. EXPOSED. THERE had been a high time at the fashion- able summer resort for some weeks, and the hero of it was a man of fasci- nating appearance and all the usual qualities to be found in the hero of mod- ern fiction. When he smiled all the women were at his feet, and not simply because he was the only good-looking man in the place. The gossips were al- 4 ready beginning to whis- Cai EA per and to predict an en- sis. FAVORITES gagement between him JUDGE'S FAVOR and the belle of the town, PAOLA DEL MONTE, Seflorita, or Mademoiselle, ‘They were constantlyto: Be Miss. or Mra. and with us dwell! gether, and the story of in many a language your songs are sweet, % ‘And you are the same, {rom head to feet: her heart could be read in ‘ou have won, with your tanguorous Latin way, Avplace that none ote can il, Ab, say! her eyes. But the end came at THE FOOT-BALL PLAYER'S ADVANTAGE. last. One day they were t's the matter down here?” A VALUABLE ACCOMPLISHMENT. sitting together in a se- Nh, this foolish fiend tackled that half-back and tried **/M[Y BEING a good musician saved my life the cluded corner, when he to rush him into the lake of fire.” last time the levee gave way,” said Mrs. pulled his handkerchief Mississippi. from his pocket and some- “ Why, how was that ?” said Mrs. Boston. thing fell to the floor. The adoring girl immediately grabbed it, saying that she would keep it as “ Well, you see, my husband floated down the souvenir of him, but when she looked at it their romance was ended. There was no need to river on the stove "—— be a Sherlock Holmes to know that he was a family man, and, what was even worse, that his “ Weill?” home was probably in Brooklyn. The souvenir that she had picked up was a safety-pin. "T accompanied him on the piano.” Lam Ni \ORUF, STATISTICALLY MILD. Oh, dear me! T think foot-ball is a dreadfully rough game. It’s a wonder you are not all killed." TAIN —"' It looks rough, madam, but there is really very little danger of casualties, Why, statistics prove that there are actually more deaths in the States every year by cyclones than there are by foot-ball.” c United comicbooks.com