Judge — October 9, 1897 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HER ONE EXCEPTION. F ALL the women new I'll swear ‘The newest one was Kate; For she would sit and by the bour Of woman-suffrage prate. Bat since the dear girl passed beyond The twenty-five-year stage Tnote, where birthdays are concerned, She is behind the age. ME LANDBURGH WILSON, SHE COULDN'T EXIST. Mrs. Chinchin—' What would you do, darling, if I should sudden- ly become deaf and dumb?” Mr. Chinchin (with unholy de- light)—" Why, I'd send for an un- dertaker.” NOT DULY PENITENT. DOROTHY had said a naughty word because her new hat didn’t suit, and mamma sent her to her room to ask God to forgive her. Through the partly-open door was heard : : ae the little girl's petition—“ Ob, God, forgive me for being Oo naughty, but you can wear the old hat yourself if you want THE WAY SHE GOT AROUND IT. tor Treen Mrs, BenHam—"* In the next world people will be doing the same they do in this.” 3 Benitam—" I don't believe it, Now, | am a night-clerk. How am | to get work in my line if I go where there is no night? ‘Answer me. Mrs, Benam—' That's easy—you won't go there,” AN EVENING SYMPHONY. THEY were sitting in the quiet moonlight, gazing upon the various heavenly bodies visible above the cbimney-tops. One of his arms was around her waist, one of his hands held hers; and if he had possessed more arms and hands—which unfortunately he didn’t—they would probably have been similarly engaged. The music of a fine old organ from a church across the way floated toward them, and the shrill churr of a cricket calling to its mate in the grass occasionally broke the stillness. Altogether, it was a heavenly time. “Isn't it perfectly beautiful?” she softly said as the music paused for a moment. “Yes,” he answered musingly; "and they are said to do it with their hind legs.” And so the charm was sadly broken? REPARTEE. HE MEANT WELL. Say, Species, gou'en an ecceenric aesk.” Ex-convict— Well, old boy, I just got out to-day.” “That's nothing compared to your crookedness, Mr, Bar." AN APOLOGY. Keuty—" Phwat did yez hit Kerrigan fer?” Murriiy—" He sed thot phwat Oi didn’t know wud fill a book.” Kew n’ didn’t yez make him upolygoize ?” MuxrHy—** Oi did. “Oi made him confiss roight befor all th’ crowd thot phwat Oi didn’t know wud fill siveral loibraries.’ comicbooks.com |