Judge — June 5, 1897 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

BELATED. L GIVE ns your slasses, pilot ; let go the main- sail, quick ! Sea-serpent, true as preacl awful thick ; Or else a shipwreck, boatswain—aye, sure as I The fog is am born, Just get your life-boats ready and toot upon your horn, m. I say, he isn't “scary,” and doesn’t seem to dive; I think that we can catch him and take him home alive, Suppose we speak him civil—'*Ahoy, my jolly dog !" Hark ! what's the critter saying—eh? ‘* Bayard on a log. v. ‘* L may have been ‘exotic’ when taken out to dine ; A little light in ballast on the patriotic line ; But this will be a ‘corker,’ as I’m a sailor bold, log’ from out ‘the May- And ‘omeward bound upon a* flower's hold. vi * Hay ! won't the ghosts of Bradford and Captain Standish stare To see me in my English suit * orating * over there? And won't the people wonder who wrote my little speech, And Harvard students holler that Bayard is a peach ? vit. ** Perhaps not quite ‘ official," but surely no one cares " I've been a mate and skipper for more than forty year, But never saw a thing before that looked so mighty queer. May bea sort of merman, Let's take the thing in tow And sell him on arrival to Barnum-Bailey’s show. Ww. ‘Perhaps somewhat ‘ belated,’ a trifle after date ; Am overdue in Boston, but coming home in state; So don’t delay me, stranger, nor offer me your barge, For I'm a floating * plenipo'-ambassador-at- large. WORSE THAN REPORTED. Mrs. SitH—' They say Mrs. Jones is so delirious that she fails to recognize her own bicycle when they bring it into the room.” Mrs, Brown—"' Then she is worse than I thought she I heard it was her baby that she failed to recognize.” was, NOT PROPERLY FURNISHED. Mary Ann— lookin’ at, did yez? Bridget—" Oi did not. They'd no rack in th’ base- mint hall fer me boike.” yez didn't take thot place yez wor If a fellow brings a parcel and trips down the back stairs. And who could do it better? You see it's quite my forte ‘To thave a shy’ at Plymouth Rock en route from Irit- ain’s court.” NOT TO BE EXPECTED. Northern visitor (in a Kentucky bar-room)—" By 7 Jove! Colonel Corkright is already drinking his seventh s of whisk Major Gore—* Of cou'se, sub. Yo" didn’t expect him to wait and drink his seventh glass aftuh his ninth instead of taking it aftuh his sixth, whuh it belongs, did yo’, suh INDISPUTABLE. Mrs, Waynack—" Wa.al, Hiram, yew promised tew quit hoss-tradin’, an’ naow yew hev traded fer thet thing. HixaM—" Thet’s why I made this trade—so thur wouldn't be enny danger uv me makin’ enny more.” i A SAD TALE OF A CARELESS DOG AND A DOWN GRADE. comicbooks.com