Judge, 1897-01-09 · page 3 of 16
Judge — January 9, 1897 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Page Analysis: Judge Magazine, Page 19 This page contains several humorous sketches and poems targeting social situations rather than specific political figures: **"Heavy Thinking"** depicts a domestic scene where a woman worries her husband thinks poorly of her, while he's actually preoccupied with business concerns—satirizing the gap between spouses' assumptions. **"The Snob"** is a poem mocking snobbish behavior and pretension among the wealthy classes. **Other pieces** include humor about teaching mathematics, grandmother's hats as fashion, and winter underclothing complaints. **"Arctic Restitution"** shows a walrus being returned, apparently satirizing some kind of practical joke or restoration scenario. The content appears primarily *social satire* rather than political commentary—poking fun at everyday class anxieties, gender dynamics, and human foibles typical of Judge's genteel humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
HEAVY THINKING. Recoy—"' Do your folks think very much of me, Ethel ?” ErHet—' Why, they think of nothing else, Reggy—they even lie awake nights—worrying.” THE SNOB, Wen Thackeray wrote his ‘* Book of Snobs” He knew mankind too sadly well, And time that sears us never robs ‘This creature of his charm and spell. He is the least ; he apes the best, But in a fashion that should set Wise men to patiently attest That folly has not matched him yet. He moves along his little way Contented with his little lot ; Contented if his bleat or bray Shall leave no single sign nor blot. But he is pitiful indeed When, in our large and blaring land, He mimics gentlehood with greed * Of Liliput to wield command. I speak of Aim. Alas! I know That, as the world has learned to see, Even where our new world’s trumpets blow ‘The vapid snob may be a she. GRORGE EDGAR MONTCOMERY, WINTER UNDERCLOTHING. *eBRRR !" said Davie, “why wasn’t that shirt shaved ‘fore I put it on?” OUR LANGUAGE. ‘an’ then ter-morrer yew kin cut it “up’.” Free Lance (the Laplander}—"* It's about time that walrus put in an—= — appearance I FARMER (fo son)—"* Yew kin go out an’ cut thet tree ‘down,’ MY GRANDMOTHER'S HAT. MV grandmother's hat, in colonial days. Was a wonder for poets to sing : Her granddaughter flashes it now on my gaze, At the play—and I can’t see a thing. HIS MATHEMATICS, Mr. Bud-teacher — “ Really, Miss Pedagogical, I cannot teach young Pick- aninny anything, he is so stupid. He does not even know what one plus two plus three are.” Miss Pedagogical —“ Perhaps you are too abstract with him. Make your work more concrete. Ask him what one apple and two apples and three apples are.” Mr. Bad-teacher (in the class-room) —" Young Pickaninny, what are one apple and two apples and three apples ?” Young Pickaninny —“ Boss, is dey big apples? If dey is, dey is mos’ a peck.” NATURAL CONCLUSION, Wee One (seeing a flash of lightning for the first time in her life)—" Oh! what was that, Wee Two?” Wee Two—* They was scratching a match up there.” Tue warus—" I wish he'd hurry and come up: I want to give him his harpoon.” comicbooks.com