Judge, 1896-08-15 · page 4 of 16
Judge — August 15, 1896 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page from *Judge* contains several satirical pieces typical of turn-of-the-century American humor: **"Judge's Favorites"** features Marie Dressler, a popular actress of the era, in celebratory verse. **"A Case of Obtuseness"** is a dialect-humor piece depicting an exchange between a white man ("Mars' Mason") and an enslaved or formerly enslaved Black man ("Uncle Rastus"). The joke relies on racial stereotypes common to the period: the humor derives from the Black character's supposed logical confusion and suspected turkey theft. This represents offensive period humor that traded on minstrelsy conventions. **Other pieces** include light domestic humor ("A Swallowing Measure," "The Old, Old Story") about shopping and marriage—typical genteel magazine fare. **"The Choice"** is sentimental poetry about a woman offering flowers to a man who chooses the mature "full-blown rose" over the younger woman's preference. The page reflects *Judge*'s mix of celebrity coverage, racial caricature (standard for the era), and sentimental romantic narratives aimed at middle-class readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Photo. by Dupont. JUDGE'S FAVORITES. MARIE DRESSLER. You're a meteor in red, sweet Marie! Upamong the clouds you tread, in your glee. Every star that's in the sky’ Winks an eye when you come nigh, And we know the reason why, ‘Sweet Marie. A CASE OF OBTUSENESS. Mars’ Mason—" Hillo, Uncle *Rastus! how are you this morning?” Uncle Rastus —"'s polly, tank de Lawd!" Mars’ Mason—" Now,Uncle'Ras- tus, you can’t convince me you have anything to be thankful for in being poorly. Why do you say that?" Unele *Rastus—"“Huceam 1 tanks de Lawd fo’ bein’ po'ly, mars’? Well, sub, w'en a body's polly spell is de’sult ob biled tuckey, if hit ain't some- pin’ to tank de Lawd ‘bout, den w’at am?” Mars’ Mason (thoughtfully)— “H'm! and where did you get the turkey? I—ha! ha!—haven't missed one from my poultry-house.”* Uncle" Rastus (piously, disappear- ing round the corner) —"Hit sho'ly look OWING MEASURE. w far is it to Jaytown, old chappie ?” ” ‘About two thirsts and an eat, pard,”” Tue 1A! Mr. Hu: LADY: laik de ‘postle ben right w’en he say,‘ Habin’ eyes dey see not, an’ ears dey am deef as a post,’ ‘case I ‘clar foh Moses dat tuckey gobble loud ‘nuf toc wake de daid—hit pintedly did !" Husnaxp—"* How do you like the view ?” Wire (teith ecstasy) —"* Oh, Lam speechless !" Husbanp —"* Well, if that be so I think we had better stay here for a while.” RLIZARETH A. YORE, THE OLD, OLD STORY. HE STOOD behind the coun- ter in happiest of moods, Unto her gaze displaying the latest styles of goods— New cloths of ev'ry color, crépons of lightest weight, Silks of exquisite lustre, and satins up to date, Each pattern she examined, and gushingly admired, As tho’ it were the very design she most desired ; However. his patient efforts to sell were all in vain— Because she only thanked him And said she 'd call again. ANNIE M. TOOMRY. T'S whin a man has wather on the brain thot his hid swims, SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE. *1 boarded a car at Fourteenth street an’ "— RFORD —*And I suppose there was lots of room inside.” THE CHOICE, TNs jacqueminots were in the vase ; One bud with leaves unsealed, And one whose velvet open face Its yellow heart revealed. Two women in the fragrant room Sat at the sunset hour ; One delicate in girlish bloom, One rich in grace and power. To one the world was all untried, A dream, a hope, a joy; One knew that bliss has pain allied Like gold with its alloy. Another entered—one whose name Had graced his country's scroll Of honor ; bravery won him fame ; ‘A man of brain and soul. The girl's face into welcome broke Like sunshine after showers : “lk “Which will you choose?” she smiling spoke, And proffered him the flowers. He pressed the roses to his lips ; ‘The woman bent her head ; The blood surged to her finger-tips ; “ The full-blown rose,” he said. SARAM XK, BOLTON, comicbooks.gom