Judge — May 23, 1896 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHY HE TREMBLED. :A DELICATE INSINUATION. Mr. WofsTurn (desperately}—"* Say, Maria, how much we could save on ice this A CAREFUL summer if you could only manage to keep your feet in the refrigerator !" BOY. BETWEEN TWO FIRES. “GAY. Sister (A social problem of contemporancous human interest, in three chapters.) Blanche?” “What is it CHAPTER 1. Willie?” MCALLISTER MCILHENNY was one of those flip and familiar young men not infrequently met in the social circles of our best society, or words to that effect. He had recently met a young woman who had interested him more than ordinarily, and as she rather admired the McAllister Mcllhenny style she had invited him “Is it right to say ‘burns is’ or ‘burns are'?” “Burns are, Wille to call, and he had accepted, as might have been expected. “Then, Sister Alter hedging a while he moved over quite close to her. Blanche?” “What would you think,” he asked, “‘if I kissed you?” She frowned. “I'd think you were a knave,” she replied in that helpless tone an unprotected woman always assumes. “Well, Willie?” “Mr. Burns are down in the parlor waiting to see you.” CHAPTER 11. on, QUE MAN Sitratns (Cremuousi))—" Oh, Gawd help me A full minute has elapsed since the last chapter. . Gawd help me And what would y par ; ; RUSHING Ja jacieon with a spulchratgrean)—" Weam ghosts! "AA what would you think,” inquired MeAllster Metthenny, TIMES. Ob, we am ghosts !” if I did not kiss you? She frowned again. “I'd think you were a fool,” she answered, blushing prettily. Editor —"\t might be well enough to order a double edition for to-morrow.” Publisher —" Anything extraordinary in sight?” Editor—" Mysterious murder in high life. 1 have sent three of our best mind-readers to inter- view the suspects.” CHAPTER IIL. Now which did McAllister Mc- Mhenny elect to become? Ww. Je LAMPTON. NoTice—Any lady giving a correct solution to this problem will be entitled to a year’s subscription to JUDGE at the regular rates. HE PARTS THEM. Twynn—"1 should think that a stuttering man would naturally be an excellent grammarian.” Triplett—"\ don't see what . that has to do with it.” ising to the occasion) —" Shucks! Twynn—" Well, he would be say s0 befo!?— familiar with the parts of speech.” Ou W'y didn’ yo" TOOK NO STOCK IN THE STORY. *sP)O YOU know that the wo- men of our town got out a woman's edition of one of the pa- pers, and that there wasn’t even so much as a quarrel?” “Yes; and just then, I sup- pose, you woke up.” AS IT SEEMED TO HER. “DPD RACIOUS!” exclaimed Margie, relating her first experience at the dentist's, “ze toof zest dot so bid an’ hurty zat ze man touldn't hardly det it out srough ze SEEKING POLICE PROTECTION, ‘ittle toof hole.” —T tought et fust et wuz mah wife an’ mudder-in-law.” comicbooks.com